A Day in the Life Homeschooling Ages 6, 8, 11, and 13 (Updated)

We complete one set of subjects on Monday,Wednesday, and Friday, and another set on Tuesdays and Thursdays, with some overlapping. Today I'll share our Mon-Wed-Fri schedule, and later this week our Tuesday-Thursday schedule.

A Word About Vision and Goals

You might notice we don't have any extra-curriculars scheduled. We aren't big on them because they tend to crowd out family devotions and family dinners, which are what we feel strengthen families and provide kids with rock-solid foundations--something peers and extra-curricular teachers can't do for us.

If one of my children happened to be a gymnastics super star, or an exceptionally talented soccer champ, we might feel differently about extra-curriculars, but our children's God-given strengths and interests don't happen to be in organized sports or lessons. They play sports in the backyard with each other, which makes them happy. Free time is important to them.

Additionally, my children have each other to play with, whereas smaller families may need more outside stimulation. Each family has unique needs, and each home-managing couple has to find ways to meet those needs the best they can, in ways that uphold the family's vision statement (or philosophy).

Friday Changes On Friday afternoons things are different than what is scheduled below. We schedule two hours for art/crafts or baking, and then we go to the library, though this is subject to change if something special is going on at the library on another day. But generally, Friday works best.

One or possibly two of my children have dyslexia, and another has dyscalculia and dysgraphia. The All About Spelling and All About Reading programs both address those special needs. Also, I have one case of ADHD. two cases of OCD, and one case of Generalized Anxiety Disorder. My youngest has juvenile rheumatoid arthritis. All of these needs together make it necessary to stick to a structured schedule. Everyone is happier with structure here--structure with room for creativity.

If there are doctor's appointments to schedule, I try to make them after 2 PM, but not too close to dinner. Appointments tend to be at least once a week between the arthritis and other needs.

Monday, Wednesday, Friday 
For our Tues-Thurs Schedule, click here.

7:30 - Wake-Up 

I'm up at 7:30, in the shower at 7:40, after inserting a load of clothes. I dress, comb and scrunch my wet, permed hair, apply make-up and make my bed, and help the six-year-old with her bed.

The kids trickle out between 7:45 and 8:10, with Beth, age 6, often up first. They make their beds, get dressed, put their pajamas in the hamper, and then play with Legos, Hot Wheels, board games or whatever. It's basically free time until 8:30, but no computer.

Bible - Boys (If they get to bed late the night before for some reason, I let them sleep longer, and in that case they read the Bible before ending school for the day. They have a check-off sheet for each subject, and that has to be checked by me before they're finished for the day.)

8:30 - Breakfast & Devotions

We eat oatmeal or Cheerios or Shredded Wheat, and then we all rinse our bowls and gather for devotions in the living room. I'm reading from the Miller Family Series, currently in their Proverbs book called Wisdom And the Miller's, to which we all look forward.

After the reading we all take turns praying about our upcoming day, about the Proverb we learned, about various needs, after first giving thanks. 

The children will brush their teeth next, and I will fix the girls' hair.

9:30 - Quick Write Journals

They write in their journals for 15 minutes, with the kindergartner either using the Draw Write Now series of books, or working with me on Handwriting Without Tears. The kindergartner will often keep working into the next segment.

9:45 - 10:30 

All About Reading Level 2 - Mary (age 8) and Mommy 

Teaching Textbooks Math DVD program Level 7 - Peter (age 13)

Sonlight Literature Reading from World History Part 1 (Core G) - Paul (age 11)

Puzzles, Painting, PlayDoh, or Drawing - Beth (kindergarten)

10:30 - 11:15  (Everyone switches from the subjects above. The boys use the same curriculum so they have to rotate with some of the resources.)

All About Reading Level 1 - Beth (Grade K) and Mommy (She can only concentrate 30 minutes tops, and that's pushing it.)

Teaching Textbooks Math DVD  program Level 7 - Paul

Sonlight Literature Reading from World History Part 1 (Core G) - Peter

Puzzles, Painting, PlayDoh, or Drawing - Mary

11:15 - 11:45  Snack and Break

Children might do crafts, such as make up a miniature puppet theater, or get out the construction paper/scissors/glue, or play board games or cards after having a quick snack. If they're highly involved in their creations, this can go 20 to 30 minutes longer, but usually we stay on track.

I shuffle laundry throughout the day, including at this time. I also try to unload and load the dishwasher during this half-hour.

11:45 - 12:30 

Writing - Boys and Mommy

Making Books at Writing Center - Girls

Split Week - The segment below, 12:30 to 1:15, is split for the girls. Monday and Friday the girls do Saxon Math at this time, and on Wednesday they do All About Spelling. This splitting gives them 4 days per week of Math, and 3 days per week of spelling.

12:30 - 1:15 (Monday and Friday Only)

Saxon Math - Girls and Mommy (Beth, the K student, doesn't work the whole 45 minutes.)

Easy Grammar Workbooks - Boys

Paul plays the piano after grammar. He's teaching himself with piano books, with the goal of being able to play music at Christmas for his family, or hymns for his family devotions. 

12:30 - 1:15 (Wednesday Only)

All About Spelling Level 1 - Girls and Mommy 

Easy Grammar Workbooks - Boys (same as Monday and Wednesday for boys.)

1:15 - 2:30 Lunch Break 

If we need milk from the dollar store or have to go to the pharmacy window, that will usually happen at the end of the lunch break. I buy five gallons of milk once a week (2 jugs nonfat and 3 jugs 2%), but we need one additional milk run before a week is up.

2:30 - 3:00

All About Spelling Level 2 & 3 - Boys and Mommy 
We switched to All About Spelling this year. It's recommended that you take older students through all the levels so they don't miss any of the spelling rules. Level 2 is too easy so I try to cover both 2 and 3 at the same time, only covering words from Level 2 that are needed to illustrate the spelling rules they don't know well.

Free Time - Girls (Without interrupting Momma's spelling lessons with the boys.)

3:00 - 3:30  Read-Aloud

Mom reads aloud from the girls' Sonlight Core B read-aloud list. My husband reads aloud to the boys later at night from their Sonlight Core G read-aloud list. However, the boys also enjoy listening to the girls' selections. They're highly funny, engaging books! We just finished Owls In the Family by Farley Mowat, and now we're into Henry Huggins by Beverly Cleary. On Fridays we read from Mrs. Piggle Wiggle.

3:30 - 3:45 Afternoon Clean-Up

We tidy up the house. I wipe down the bathrooms or sweep, and finish up kitchen chores. The kids put away anything they've left out during the day. If it gets way too messy before this, we do five- minute pick-up segments during the day.

3:45 - 5:30 Free Time 

Free time inside or out, depending on temperature and precipitation. In other seasons, they're outside during snack break and lunch break also.

Or, complete any unfinished school work.

5:30 - 6:30 Take Turns in Shower and Free Time 

Mom makes dinner, sometimes with kids' help, while also shuffling laundry and conditioning the 6-year-old's hair. Kids clear off table for dinner.

6:45 Dinner

Husband joins us when he arrives home at 7:00 PM. Having dinner this late isn't ideal, but it works for families in which Daddy works late.


7:30 Family Devotions & Prayer

We're currently working through Leading Little Ones to God, recommended by Sonlight as part of their Core B package.

8:10  Take vitamins, chronic-condition medicines, and brush teeth. If there are a lot of clothes in the kids' individual laundry baskets, they fold those and put them away after teeth brushing.

8:30  Daddy reads to boys. Mom reads picture books to kindergartner, and most often the 2nd grader cuddles with us too.

8:50 Bedtime for girls

9:20 - Bedtime for boys

I do the dishes, sometimes with my husband's help, but he often has to talk on the phone with his 92-year-old father, who lives alone in Florida by choice. I also check for any last laundry loads to shuffle.

Before bed I...read the Bible, get teaching materials ready for the next day, pay any necessary bills, research any curriculum or methods or books, order school supplies, or read blogs and/or write a blog. If there's a major news story ongoing, I read about that (we have no TV signal, so online news is all we have). I tend to stay up late because all of this takes time. My husband is on his feet all day, so he generally goes to bed by 10 PM. Two to three times a week, I also go to bed early.

My days are full and fabulous, despite the difficult health conditions we deal with. I couldn't be more grateful for this lifestyle. Being together so much strengthens and grounds us, and prepares us to serve God with joy when we go out into the world, at church, at the library, in the neighborhood, at appointments, on errands. We pray for each other and share each other's burdens, and remind each other to give it all to God. Even when things are messy and some are in bad moods, it's still all good, all building toward a stronger character as we stumble but keep trying to be like Jesus.

Galatians 6:2 Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.

Philippians 1:6 And I am sure of this, that he who began a good work in you will bring it to completion at the day of Jesus Christ.

Simple Woman's Daybook 1/20/15

Outside my window

After one snow day in November and nothing in December, Ohio is finally receiving some semi-regular snow, evidenced by several snowmen in the neighborhood. Snow is winter's fancy dressing, like leaves in fall and flowers in spring. I sincerely missed it.

I am thinking

We missed eight days of school due to the flu and its aftermath. I'm so thankful for some very productive school days now, with a new, detailed winter schedule leaving nothing out. Without a detailed schedule, we don't do well here. The more children you're schooling, the more necessary it is to be intentional, and accountable to a detailed schedule reflecting your values and goals.

Our Internet was down for four days and we learned that we're more productive here without it. My basketball fans were hoping to keep up with college basketball scores, but during the outage they learned they're fine with not knowing how a game turned out. The children and I resolved to keep Internet use to a minimum, with no checking up on our interests until school and chore hours end. We all share one PC so allowing everyone on each day can be a challenge, but it's working to keep its use to after 3:45 PM, except for the boys' math DVD program.

I am reading

During morning devotions we're reading Wisdom And the Miller's, based on Proverbs, which is the best devotional I've ever used with children. It's appropriate for multiple ages, including teens. I love it so much I read ahead in the evenings. The stories used to illustrate each Proverb are engrossing and highly convicting for all.

For evening devotions with Daddy, we're reading Leading Little Ones to God by Marian Schoolland.

I'm reading my way through John in the Bible.

I've ordered several other Miller Family Series resources, and just today I ordered Grace-Based Parenting by Tim Kimmel.

I am thankful...

~ for the privilege of being a parent. It's incredibly challenging but I love it immensely.

~ for 4 little hearts to shape for His glory, by his grace.

~ for Proverbs, Psalms and the Gospels...really the whole Word of God.

~ that my Paul loves reading the Bible.

~ for family prayer.

~ that we are all finally well again!

~ for reaching the teen years with Peter, as of January 11, and we're still close!

~ for the All About Spelling program, which all the children love.

~ for my husband's hard work and dedication to his family.

~ for a clean bill of health after my diagnostic mammogram and ultrasound. I'm so glad that's over! There were some benign cyst areas. This type of detailed mammogram was very painful, with its intense squeezing of the breast tissue (a more intense squeezing than a regular mammogram). I had to think, privately, "You've got to be kidding me! Aren't you injuring tissue with this thing?" You're not supposed to breathe while she takes the picture. While it's painful, it's also fast once she places you and gets behind the camera.

Afterwards the tech asked me if I'd had any trouble with discharge from my breasts (one of the breast cancer signs), because she saw a discharge during the squeezing, which I was unaware of in my pained state. When she told me about it I felt ninety percent certain it was probably breast milk leftover. Most women can squeeze a few drops out months after nursing, but it doesn't occur to us to do this.

I had to then get an ultrasound partially because of the fluid she saw. I told the ultrasound tech about finishing nursing just 18 months prior, which she relayed to the doctor who reads the films. The doctor thought that was a sufficient explanation and said not to worry about it.

I don't look forward to yearly mammograms after this experience! I had no idea what to expect prior to getting my first mammogram in December. Honestly, I thought you stood there without a shirt and got an x-ray carefully targeted to only the breast. That's not what happens. A tech places your breast between some plates, which squeeze it to practically a pancake quite frankly, allowing for a detailed picture. Two films are taken on each side from different angles. A regular mammogram does not necessary hurt, however. Just the diagnostic type, in my experience.

Scriptures for family life encouragement

Proverbs 12:7 The wicked are overthrown and are no more, but the house of the righteous stands firm.

Proverbs 22:6 Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it.

Proverbs 31:28-29 Her children arise and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praises her: “Many women do noble things, but you surpass them all.”

Joshua 24:15 But if serving the Lord seems undesirable to you, then choose for yourselves this day whom you will serve, whether the gods your ancestors served beyond the Euphrates, or the gods of the Amorites, in whose land you are living. But as for me and my household, we will serve the Lord.”

Genesis 33:5 Then Esau looked up and saw the women and children. “Who are these with you?” he asked. Jacob answered, “They are the children God has graciously given your servant.”

Romans 8:16-17 The Spirit himself testifies with our spirit that we are God’s children. Now if we are children, then we are heirs—heirs of God and co-heirs with Christ, if indeed we share in his sufferings in order that we may also share in his glory.

Galatians 4:4-7 But when the set time had fully come, God sent his Son, born of a woman, born under the law, to redeem those under the law, that we might receive adoption to sonship. Because you are his sons, God sent the Spirit of his Son into our hearts, the Spirit who calls out,“Abba,Father.” So you are no longer a slave, but God’s child; and since you are his child, God has made you also an heir.

Ephesians 1:3-6 Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ. For he chose us in him before the creation of the world to be holy and blameless in his sight. In love he predestined us for adoption to sonship through Jesus Christ, in accordance with his pleasure and will— to the praise of his glorious grace, which he has freely given us in the One he loves.

Ephesians 6:1-2 Children, obey your parents in the Lord, for this is right. 2 “Honor your father and mother”—which is the first commandment with a promise—

Ephesians 6:4 Fathers, do not exasperate your children; instead, bring them up in the training and instruction of the Lord.

Colossians 3:18-20 Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them. Children, obey your parents in everything, for this pleases the Lord.

Have a good week!

Discernment In 2015

One of the more damaging things that dysfunctional homes produce, particularly substance-addiction homes, is children who grow up confusing pity with love. At adolescence these children choose boyfriends or girlfriends they pity, thinking they're in love. They choose friends they pity, thinking they can rescue them. Or they choose friends unwisely simply because, deep down, they don't think they deserve any better.

I have confused pity with love my whole life, and it wasn't until this year, having silenced my mom's voice in my life through an ultimatum--stop drinking and verbally abusing me, or I stop the relationship--that I've become completely conscious of my dysfunctional pitying.

Like so many of my posts, this one is primarily me preaching to myself about past mistakes so I won't repeat them. My word for 2015 is discernment.

Here are a few examples of my folly.

Example 1

There was a 70-year-old woman in our former church who didn't have any family support, no children of her own, who had come out of an abusive childhood home (physical and mental abuse). Abrasive at times, judgmental, and gossipy, she loved attention and would go to great lengths to get it, even monopolizing Bible studies with her grandstanding, exaggerating situations to garner pity, and manipulating people for her own ends. Truly, she only cared about herself and used people at will, but there was some kindness there at times--perhaps just enough to rope people in.

When her Bible study leaders, a married couple, sat down with her and told her she had to change her behavior or not come back to study, she called me and poured out her sob story, garnering much pity, even as I sympathized with her study leaders, being acquainted with her dysfunctional personality myself. What did I do, with my pitying ways? With husband's permission I started a Bible study here for "my friend" and her husband and one other family, with the permission of her former study leaders (the husband being an elder).

They came once and then came up with excuses (and sometimes we had to cancel due to illness), primarily because it wasn't large enough for her to get any real attention, and she didn't want a Bible study. She wanted attention and pity.

When her husband fell on some ice and became partially disabled for a season, she would call and ask to come over and watch a family movie with us, while still not being available for Bible studies. She was desperate for fellowship, she would say, but it always came out the same--her being an attention monger and subtly abrasive, while not really caring about us (isn't true fellowship a give and take?), or even really caring about her husband, although it took time for me to see this truth.

The other family (mother and two adult daughters. one of whom was severely disabled) came for several months, but I had to discontinue it because of worsening anxiety disorders here, and because I learned this family already belonged to six Bible studies. They certainly didn't need another, especially if it was stressful for us, the Bible study invite having included a dinner here beforehand.

I hate quitting things and feel like a failure every time it happens, but I chronically overextend myself and have to quit something at least a couple times a year. This overcommiting is another characteristic of adult children of alcoholics. They try to rescue so many people, they end up messing up their own lives.

That's where I drew the line when deciding whether to quit something: My children come first. God blessed me with them as my primary ministry and responsibility, outside of being a wife.

Some adult children of alcoholics grow up to drink themselves and attract enablers, rather than trying to rescue people (or they do both). I ended up with the least damaging characteristics, and for that I'm grateful to God, who had his hand in my life even before I sought him.

Example 2

We have a neighbor boy who lives with his grandmother, who has raised him since he was 18 months old, following the death of his mother. He came to Bible study here for two years, but that ended recently, and he also accompanies us to AWANA. Learning that three nights per week he had to go with his grandmother on her night-time custodial jobs, lasting until 10 PM, I offered to watch him a couple nights a week. His grandmother initially said she was thinking about asking for my help anyway. She indicated she would call me the next week to discuss it.

Instead of ever calling, she just came to the door one day the next week, and dropped him off, telling me he had autism, anger issues, depression, and ADHD. This gave me no option, without hurting the child, of backing out, in my mind. I hadn't noticed all of these disorders when he came for Bible study. He was relatively easy to deal with in our prior experience, and it didn't seem like it would be an over-extension to help them out.

I didn't like the way she handled it up front, as we weren't prepared for him that first day. Not to mention, I already have my hands full with my own children's disorders. But it felt like the right thing to do, so we gave it a try.

His behavior became problematic within two weeks, primarily because he was here far more hours and became overly comfortable, not caring about displaying his best guest behavior. There were other hardships entailed in the endeavor, including that he frequently came while ill. Over his Christmas holiday from school, we prepared for him as usual, but he never came those two weeks, and we didn't get a phone call. I couldn't go anywhere those days, expecting him at 4 PM each of our non-holiday babysitting afternoons.

He showed up at my door again after he returned to school, with no explanation or phone call. I had called the previous day to say we had the flu, just in case he showed up, but they didn't get the message.

Today I wrote her a note, giving her all the reasons I couldn't continue to help right now--there were four legitimate reasons--and I offered to watch him just once a week after cold and flu season was over, in early May. Beth's arthritis gets worse with each virus, since the autoimmune response to illnesses causes the disease to attack her joints even more. And her immunosuppressant drug makes illness problematic for another reason, although she's made it through the flu without a doctor visit, thank the Lord.

Example 3

I have tried to help other neighborhood kids, telling our friend Lexie to come two afternoons a week for homework help. This child, after already being held back in early elementary, was seriously behind in her first year of middle school, failing most classes.

She either didn't show up on the designated homework days, or she showed up and wasn't interested in doing her homework for more than ten minutes. She wanted to play or have my undivided attention. She and her mother were taking advantage of me. Neither truly cared about this young lady's school performance (her mother refused to work with her, the reasons for which I'm unaware).

I still tried to counsel where I could when she came over to play (which happened less and less as she neared 13 years old) but otherwise I stepped away from this family, who also tried to chronically show up here while ill.

Their mother drinks, which is why I initially felt pulled to help change the course of our young friend's future (education giving her options for success, for example), but in the first few years we knew her, I was unaware of her mother's drinking. The brother came over for mostly outside playtime starting last summer, and he has his own serious problems.

Unfortunately, our young friend Lexie was recently sent back to fifth grade, which is probably all the schools could think of as a solution, given the family's failure to engage. The mother blamed the school problems on her daughter's ADHD, and on the school's failure to make allowances for her daughter's "handicap". Really, that was the easy way out, although I do believe Lexie has learning disabilities. But, she played outside all over the neighborhood and beyond until dark most nights, failing to do any homework. As she gained friends on other streets she was less and less engaged here, and I quickly gave up, perceiving that I wanted her to succeed more than she wanted it herself.

Some people who need help don't want it. They just want attention, but on their terms. They like to complain, but won't listen to solutions or follow through with them. They want your sympathy, your time, your energy, and any other resources you'll give them, but they don't want to behave responsibly or maturely, and unless you're a counselor, you may be wasting your time.

I just got a phone message from the 70-year-old woman from my former church, and it prompted me to sit down and preach this post to myself--warning me against pitying and enabling people who just want to suck me dry.

She left a long message, asking me to request that my children pray for her husband, and telling me many things to garner my pity, while at the same time insulting me subtly. She indicated how much she missed my children, but in truth, when she's here she doesn't pay much attention to them. She just wants our full, undivided attention. The spotlight must be on her, or she's not fulfilled or happy with the situation. I made the mistake of sending her a Christmas card, I suppose, which prompted the call. I had stepped away from her and her ongoing dysfunction last fall.

I have no trouble holding my children accountable for any dysfunctional behavior, but with adults, I shy away from confrontation, unfortunately.

This year, 2015, I will stop making these same mistakes. I must wait when the desire to help (or pity) comes knocking at my heart. Does the person truly want help? Can I really afford the time and effort? Do they have a history of dysfunction, and as such did they find me gullible and attractive as a target? How will it impact my family? What does the Word say? Can I love them through prayer instead? What is my primary motivation in wanting to help--is it love or pity? Prompted by the Word, or something else?

I enjoy immensely the time I spend loving our Compassion children--it's a worthy effort and absolutely deserving of our time and money. I must focus my efforts on my family and these worthy endeavors, and give all the other situations to God.

People stuck in dysfunctional lifestyles don't need other people necessarily, they need God. They need a teachable heart, a repentant heart, a saved heart. Until God gives them that, or until they tire of living in dysfunction and they're motivated to improve, they must be approached with utmost caution.

Romans 14:12 So then, each of us will give an account of ourselves to God.

Romans 2:6 Who will render to every man according to his deeds

Galatians 6:5 For each will have to bear his own load.

Have you had similar experiences? How do you discern who to help, and who to leave to the Lord?

Flu 2015, Part 2

Well, it's all six of us now, down with the flu. Two of my kids vomited until their stomachs emptied, and two others only vomited once. After the initial emptying they were able to tolerate Gatorade and then crackers a few hours later. Unlike a stomach virus, this vomiting is not persistent, but it can cause fear in children, making them reluctant to eat or drink. A few sips at a time builds their confidence. Neither my husband nor myself have felt nausea and we've been able to eat most foods, just less.

The coughing and congestion are much worse than you experience with a cold virus, so heating some water in a small saucepan until just before boiling, and bringing it to the table to sit over with a towel forming a tent, will help ward off sinus and ear pain and keep you out of the doctor's office. If you let the congestion build up, it takes several steam sessions to bring significant relief, but the pain will decrease somewhat even after the first session. Have the children do this too.

Long illnesses can bring on depression, so it helped that I stocked up on movies from the library when Paul first fell ill. The movies help take our minds off our symptoms, but there have been times all of us were too sick to watch a movie. Our voices are weak, so I could only read a couple picture books.

I think Paul picked this up at a local college basketball game, which they've been going to more frequently because an 80-year-old woman that volunteers at husband's work church gives him tickets when she and her sister can't go. There's a fine line between not living a full life due to fear, and being prudent about illness risks. If we didn't have auto-immune arthritis and asthma here, I wouldn't need to be so concerned, but right now at least, I'm regretting that basketball game.

Amber, I feel for you going through this so long last fall. It makes life pass by so slowly, but I'm trying to find the blessings too. I'm witnessing the magnificence of the human immune system and that makes me give thanks to God.

Flu 2015: Notes From the Trenches

Six-year-old Beth is on an immunosuppressant drug for her arthritis, so I follow flu seasons closely. I keep her out of church classes and AWANA about half the time (when I'm not teaching), if the flu shot is not a good match to the prevailing virus. This year, 90% of sufferers are getting a more severe strain--one not included in the season's vaccine.

Flu activity went to widespread levels in most states shortly after Christmas. Every year there's an epidemic, so don't panic after reading the suddenly frequent news stories about flu 2015. The very young and very old, and the immuno-compromised, die from flu every year, and this year is no exception.

Paul, age 11, is on his third day of severe flu, with his fever once going as high as 105.6 degrees. I panicked somewhat as I haven't seen temps that high, but I got it down to 103 degrees within 30 minutes with full-body cold towels changed frequently, starting with the head and feet (and ibuprofen). Don't assume you need to see a doctor just because there's a high fever. Pay more attention to symptoms than fevers, but take the child's temperature often.

Here's what I've learned:

~ Be prepared. Stock up on Gatorade in a couple flavors and chill it when someone gets sick. It tastes awful at room temperature. Choose 100% juices that everyone likes and keep them untouched in the pantry. Buy crackers, Cheerios, and other bland foods. At first sign of illness, bake a chicken so you can prepare chicken noodle soup--a big pot with leftovers. Bone broth made at home is very healthy. Make a casserole big enough for leftovers to feed those who are still well, and in case you get sick. Buy fever reducers in bulk because it may go through the whole family. Each person will consume a lot of medicine during a five-day illness. Buy OTC medicines that will help with secondary infections--in case of sinus infections, ear infections, urinary-tract infections, etc. Severe flu makes secondary infections more likely.

~ The virus can't survive at 103 degrees, and that's why our bodies spike high fevers. That said, don't assume in the absence of fever that it can't be flu. Not everyone gets a fever with influenza.

~ Pick a sick room and keep sick children confined. The more who fall ill, the worse off Mom will be when she gets it, due to the middle of the night care required. I care for Paul with him on the couch and me over him but not in the field of his coughs. I wash my hands each time I give him care, and I use disinfectant on anything he touches. The virus is spread through respiratory droplets in the air or on surfaces. Cough germs travel about a meter and don't usually linger in the air long, but I've seen different stats regarding this.

~ High fevers (102 degrees +) cause rapid breathing. Don't mistake this for a pneumonia sign. I did that once and Beth was given a chest x-ray she didn't really need. Chest x-rays given between the ages of 10 and early adulthood are one risk factor for breast cancer. If you take a child in, there are likely to be unnecessary tests so the doctors don't miss anything and get sued. Wait for the fever to go down a degree, and then reevaluate the breathing. Children starting out healthy don't usually get pneumonia with flu, but it can happen. Look at the chest--a sucked-in look between the ribs indicates some respiratory distress and should be evaluated. Flaring nostrils is also a distress sign, but a lesser one. I usually give my older son his inhaler when I see the flaring nostrils accompanied by a constant cough.

~ The incubation period is 2 to 4 days, with 2 days being average. We are contagious 1 to 2 days before we become ill. Children can be contagious 10 days, or longer if they are immunocompromised.

~ If you catch it within 24 to 48 hours, you can get an anti-viral medicine from your doctor that will shorten the flu by 1 to 2 days.

~ Keep asthma under control so you're ready if the flu hits. Asthma can potentially be a risk factor for a more severe illness.

~ Paul had a sore throat the first day and slowed down just a little. The second day he could move around somewhat, and the sore throat was somewhat better, but the fever began. The third day seems to be the worst. He's very weak and running a constant temperature, and isn't getting up unless he has to. He should start turning the corner on day 4 or 5, according to my phone conversation with the pediatrician. Most people are well within 3 to 7 days, with fatigue and cough lingering longer.

~ You've probably read that fevers about 106 degrees can cause brain damage, but keep in mind that our bodies don't generally spike fevers during illnesses that are higher than about 105 to 105.5. The Lord knew what he was doing when he created our immune systems. If you panic and try to get fevers back to near normal, you're handicapping the immune system's response to the virus.

~ The chills can be severe with flu, but don't over do it with sweatshirts and blankets, as that will spike fevers higher than you want. A fever of about 103 degrees is a good thing for the circulating virus this year, but children younger than 5 years old need more attention and caution with higher fevers.

~ I find ibuprofen to be better than Tylenol for lowering fevers, but that may only be true in our house. You can piggyback the two medicines, but wait 3 hours after ibuprofen to give the Tylenol. Give ibuprofen every 6 hours. It's likely the medicines won't lower the fever more than to about 102 degrees, and that's okay.

~ Younger children can vomit with the flu, but with older children and adults it's individual. (Peter got sick in the PM today and did vomit.) Ibuprofen on an empty stomach can cause nausea or minor vomiting. Paul vomited once when I had to give him ibuprofen at 3AM. I gave it right away again after he stopped, the second time without water. I believe the water was a mistake, given his empty stomach and the fever combined. I use liquid-form ibuprofen. The dissolving or chewable tablets are more expensive. (Water always makes nausea worse for me, during migraines.)

~ Give a few sips of Gatorade every ten minutes around the clock during the day, if nausea becomes an issue. I learned this trick when Mary once had a severe stomach virus.

~ Keep crackers around so children can avoid an empty stomach. If they can't keep ibuprofen down, ask about Zofran, which is an anti-nausea med used for cancer patients (dissolves on the tongue, then you swallow). It's also used when someone needs to keep medicine down. Zofran reacts with a lot of medicines, so ask your pharmacy before giving it to children other than the one it's prescribed for.

~ Peppermint candy or ginger tea will also ward off nausea. Have any candy canes left over?

~ My kids start looking skinny fast during severe illnesses, but they gain it back within two weeks of being well again, so don't get upset about a temporary gaunt-like physique.

~ I have no help as my aunt is in Florida for the winter. If help is available to you, enlist it early so you don't get severely ill from being a run-down nursemaid. Adults younger than 50 years old (and definitely younger than 65) are better helpers than the elderly, who are at risk for complications.

Has it hit your house this year? Let me know if you need a prayer partner.