In my last post I indicated we would delve into the Bible for a picture of what Christian motherhood should look like. If you're a first-generation Christian mom like me, you're hungry for direction and encouragement. No matter our background, if we study the heart of God through the relevant verses, and commit our way to Him, our mothering will honor God and strengthen the Church.
God chooses to give to many woman the role of motherhood. Maybe we'd like to think we've chosen motherhood, but this isn't true. Those struggling with infertility can painfully attest to this fact.
As mothers chosen by God, our response to God's calling should be: gratitude, humility, sacrifice, commitment--not unlike our response to salvation.
Today's Verse: Titus 2:4
Each time we meet we'll look at a different scripture. Today I've chosen Titus 2.4: ..."and so train the young women to love their husbands and children."
First, a little background on the Book of Titus. Paul introduced Christianity in Crete when he and Titus visited there, and when Paul moved on, Titus stayed behind to organize the converts and lead the new church.
In New Testament times morality in Crete had sunk to a deplorable level. The island was inhabited by natives and Jews who did not know the truth of Jesus Christ.
The letter from Paul to Titus gave Titus authority and guidance, encouraged him to develop leaders within the church, and to commit everyone to sound doctrine, and to give instructions to all age groups for right living pleasing to our Lord.
Titus 2:3-5 : 3 Likewise, teach the older women to be reverent in the way they live, not to be slanderers or addicted to much wine, but to teach what is good. 4 Then they can urge the younger women to love their husbands and children, 5 to be self-controlled and pure, to be busy at home, to be kind, and to be subject to their husbands, so that no one will malign the word of God.
Titus 2:2 Teach the older men to be temperate, worthy of respect, self-controlled, and sound in faith, in love and in endurance. Titus 2:6-8 Similarly, encourage the young men to be self-controlled. 7 In everything set them an example by doing what is good. In your teaching show integrity, seriousness 8 and soundness of speech that cannot be condemned, so that those who oppose you may be ashamed because they have nothing bad to say about us.
Notice in verse 2:5 it says: ..."so that no one will malign the word of God." The New American Standard version says "so that the word of God will not be dishonored."
Everything we do as Christian mothers matters to God because as wives and mothers we are part of Kingdom-building. We are chosen for reasons higher than ourselves and our family--our husband and children are gifts, but they aren't just for our pleasure.
I've told myself during the rough patches of my 22-year Christian marriage that we would finish the race not just because we made a promise, but because our marriage matters to God and to the Church.
Likewise, our Christian children matter to God and to the Church. They help build it and grow it.
The commandment here in Titus 2:4 specific to mothers is that we are to love our children.
In Titus 2:4 the Greek word
philoteknos appears in reference to mothers loving their children. Think of:
- caring for their day-to-day physical needs
- nurturing their spirits
- embracing them with hugs
- meeting their emotional and spiritual needs
- tenderly taking them under your wing In order to love in this way, which sounds all-encompassing--we need God on our team. God never burdens us with any role, so we need not feel overwhelmed. Motherhood is a privilege and we can experience joy in it when we have God by our side.
We have the benefit of God in three persons:
- God the Father, who gives us good gifts and cherishes and loves us and wants fellowship with us
- God the Son who is our Lord and Savior and example of sacrificial love
- The Holy Spirit who is our Counselor and Teacher and the one who intercedes for us in prayer.
So, we are never alone. If we feel alone it's often because we've failed somewhat in our personal relationship with God, and that's easy to do.
Who wants us to fail in our devotion to God and family?
Who is the enemy of the Christian family, since the Christian family is so important in building up the Church?
Satan.
- He wants us to get distracted by the things of this world, so that the needs of our children don't seem as pressing as our own desires.
- He wants to make Sunday the official day of disasters so we'll miss church.
- He wants us to get bogged down in perfectionism so we lose track of the big picture. (The house is probably not going to stay clean until the children leave home. Do what you can and keep loving, and don't get discouraged if "what you can" is barely the laundry and dishes. Delegate when they're ready for chores.)
- He wants us to get in debt so we have to spend more time away from home or more time worrying.
- He wants us to buy more stuff so we have to spend more time taking care of things, rather than people.
- He wants us to stew about the irritating things people do, so we'll spend time arguing with or punishing people, rather than loving them.
Jesus warns his disciples in the Garden of Gethsemane that "the spirit is willing but the flesh is weak." He wants them to watch and pray with him because he's feeling exceedingly sorrowful about the events about to unfold.
He said to Peter, “Couldn’t you men keep watch with me for one hour?” (Matthew 26:40), and then afterward told them all to watch and pray in order to avoid temptation.
The word for “spirit” in this passage is the Greek word pneuma, which in this context refers to the soul of man or the mind. The word for “flesh” refers to the human body and nature, with its moral and physical frailties.
The story of the disciples here rings true for all of us. We are all subject to the weakness of the flesh.
No matter how much we may want to be wonderful mothers and follow Jesus, we may "fall asleep" on the job unless we heed Jesus's advice to "keep watch and pray".
Prayer
We know that we can ask God for whatever we need. Jesus made a special point that whatever we ask “in His name” He will do (John 14:13). The phrase in His name means “according to His will.”
Is praying for the strength to love our children well, praying "according to God’s will"? Absolutely! Jesus will answer the prayer for spiritual strength to overcome the flesh. When we feel the weakness of the flesh about to overpower us, we can always pray.
Keep Watch
The apostle Paul said,
“No temptation has overtaken you except what is common to mankind. And God is faithful; he will not let you be tempted beyond what you can bear. But when you are tempted, he will also provide a way out so that you can endure it” 1 Corinthians 10:13.
We should watch for the “way out.” Being spiritually watchful, we will see the temptation coming and pray for strength and victory. “The prudent see danger and take refuge, but the simple keep going and pay the penalty” Proverbs 22:3.
Our spirits can keep watch by being washed regularly with the Word of God. This keeps us in tune with the very heart of God.
Busy mothers might benefit from listening to the Word. Particularly with littles, you might be in a season where you'll soak up more Bible using Bible Gateway on audio using your phone. Whatever it takes, wash your mind with the Word.
You'll run into people who are snobby about Bible on audio--like it doesn't really count for devotions. But there are advantages to both reading and to listening. When you listen you are more in tune to the context of the passages because you go through more passages at once. It's also easy to go through the whole Bible in a year this way.
Psalm 46:1 God is our refuge and strength, an ever-present help in trouble.
Hebrews 4:16 Let us then approach God’s throne of grace with confidence, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help us in our time of need.
God chose us specifically to love our unique children and fulfill their needs, and as much as some days we may feel ill-equipped or mismatched with their temperaments, this is nonsense--a lie from the Enemy.
We are perfect for our children, as God is the perfect parent for us.
We have to engage Him as our partner, asking for what we need, knowing humbly that without him we are nothing.
There is a lot more to cover, including, what do we teach our children and how do we nurture them? Have a blessed day!