Blessings to Count - Thursday
- The van repair topped out at $240.00--something to do with an engine coil. Much better than a $2000 transmission. A huge blessing!
-Helping in AWANA last night, I felt so blessed by the children's smiles. Sweet kids.
- At the pediatrician's office for Beth and Mary's physicals today, I was blessed to hear the doctor tell Mary, "You're certainly a happy girl." Mary smiled up at him and replied, "Yeah, I am." Beth and Mary both have these electric smiles that light up our hearts. We're all smitten with them. Through God's grace and mercy, our children are happy. Flawed, yes....with flawed parents. But happy nonetheless.
- We continue to enjoy the Bob Jones second grade readers! Peter's thankfulness for the spiritual stories warms my heart, making reading time a treasure for both of us.
- We have a friend in this neighborhood. What a godsend! My aunt and uncle, who would normally help with transportation dilemmas, are in Florida until February. So, our friend helped my husband drop off and pick up our van for two different repairs recently. We were so grateful for his help.
- We don't drink tea or coffee, but late at night during the cold months I really enjoy my french vanilla cocoa. For ten glorious minutes I just sit and sip, trying to block out all the chores...all the should dos. I find it luxurious. No time for bubble baths or spa treatments or manicures. With this many kids--close in age--ten minutes with a cup of cocoa is as good as it gets.
- Lately, Mary utters the cutest things. I told the boys they had to be at the table for journals in ten minutes, and Mary stood up on the preschool table, poked her head into the kitchen (through the partially open wall) and said, "And me too, of course."
Then later she plopped into my lap, looked directly into my eyes with a half-laughing, half-serious face, and said, "We have a big problem to solve." I laughed. No problem really....she just wanted to repeat some phrase she had heard. It makes her feel like a big girl. You'd have to be in her presence to get a sense of how funny these things sound, coming from my 31-pound 3 year old.
Peter, finished with lunch before the rest of us, began reading in his reader at the table (aloud, so Mommy could follow). Mary said, "That's good reading, Peter."
-Beth made it to twenty pounds, from a birth weight of five pounds, nine ounces! She still nurses about 5 to 7 times in a twenty-four hour period (only twice during the daytime). I found it a blessing that her pediatrician didn't advise me to slow down or wean (not that I would have listened...just nice that he isn't opposed to toddler nursing).
Friday, January 8, 2010
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
plans to prosper you
Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you" declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." (NIV)
I abhor the rise of prosperity gospel preachers. They teach a false, dangerous doctrine. A few months ago, while doing dishes, I listened to twenty minutes of Joel Olsteen. The word disgust doesn't begin to cover it! He didn't say a single thing that rang true, in regards to Biblical doctrine. Let's define these characters as mere motivational speakers--not Pastors or Biblical teachers.
An excellent sermon on the Jeremiah 29:11 passage can be found at www.expository.org/jer29a.htm. Much of this post comes from that teaching.
The English word "prosperity" is not a good match for the Hebrew word "shalom", which is the word used in Jeremiah 29:11. Correctly interpreting any passage of Scripture requires examining the Hebrew words and comparing them to the English words used in translation. Many times the match is far from precise, which is why we should all own a good study Bible. And why we need to choose a church carefully, making sure the church leaders use historical context and the correct Hebrew meanings for any interpretational teaching.
So, what does "shalom" mean? It means peace. A larger definition brings in the ideas of completeness, wholeness, harmony, fulfillment, unimpaired relationship with others and with God.
If you're interested, the historical context of Jeremiah 29:11 is printed in red below. If you're not interested, skip over this red portion.
These are the words of the letter that Jeremiah the prophet sent from Jerusalem to the surviving elders of the exiles, and to the priests, the prophets, and all the people, whom Nebuchadnezzar had taken into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. 2 This was after King Jeconiah and the queen mother, the eunuchs, the officials of Judah and Jerusalem, the craftsmen, and the metal workers had departed from Jerusalem. 3 The letter was sent by the hand of Elasah the son of Shaphan and Gemariah the son of Hilkiah, whom Zedekiah king of Judah sent to Babylon to Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon. It said: 4 "Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: 5 Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. 6 Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. 7 But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare. 8 For thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: Do not let your prophets and your diviners who are among you deceive you, and do not listen to the dreams that they dream, 9 for it is a lie that they are prophesying to you in my name; I did not send them, declares the LORD. 10 "For thus says the LORD: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. 11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for wholeness and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. 13 You will seek me and find me. When you seek me with all your heart, 14 I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the LORD, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile. 15 "Because you have said, 'The LORD has raised up prophets for us in Babylon,' 16 thus says the LORD concerning the king who sits on the throne of David, and concerning all the people who dwell in this city, your kinsmen who did not go out with you into exile: 17 'Thus says the LORD of hosts, behold, I am sending on them sword, famine, and pestilence, and I will make them like vile figs that are so rotten they cannot be eaten. 18 I will pursue them with sword, famine, and pestilence, and will make them a horror to all the kingdoms of the earth, to be a curse, a terror, a hissing, and a reproach among all the nations where I have driven them, 19 because they did not pay attention to my words, declares the LORD, that I persistently sent to you by my servants the prophets, but you would not listen, declares the LORD.' 20 Hear the word of the LORD, all you exiles whom I sent away from Jerusalem to Babylon: 21 'Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, concerning Ahab the son of Kolaiah and Zedekiah the son of Maaseiah, who are prophesying a lie to you in my name: Behold, I will deliver them into the hand of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon, and he shall strike them down before your eyes. 22 Because of them this curse shall be used by all the exiles from Judah in Babylon: "The LORD make you like Zedekiah and Ahab, whom the king of Babylon roasted in the fire," 23 because they have done an outrageous thing in Israel, they have committed adultery with their neighbors' wives, and they have spoken in my name lying words that I did not command them. I am the one who knows, and I am witness, declares the LORD.' (Jeremiah 29:1-23 ESV)
Each use of the word "prosperity" refers to God's close relationship with his people, even in exile. This is the primary sense of the word shalom--peace, intimacy, unhindered relationship with God. God is working out His purposes even during the tragedies of His people. Nothing is pointless; nothing is out from under God's control.
Isaiah 40 tells us:
He tends his flock like a sheperd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.
Currently, our van is doing something new. Our mechanic doesn't own the $80,000 diagnostic machine needed to correctly analyze the problem. So today, we have it at the Toyota dealer, spending the $60 necessary to have it analyzed. It could be the transmission, or another extremely expensive repair. Or, perhaps it's something simpler. Rebuilding a transmission is a couple thousand and our mechanic doesn't think it's worth doing on such an old van. My husband quickly let him know that a new used van is not in the cards. We HAVE to keep this van running. This is even more important right now than staying current on the house payment, which has been our primary focus during this job hunt/financial crisis.
This whole post endeavors to drive this point home: Our earthly lives are typically full of curve balls. Things ebb and flow, of course, but the curves keep on coming. My issues are different than yours, but still, everyone has issues.
Issues that seem really hard to handle.
Issues that can drag on and on, making us wonder where God is in the midst of our struggles.
Jeremiah 29:11 speaks of the peace we have in relationship with God.
THAT IS ENOUGH.
It truly is.
Don't be deceived, thinking that a better income will solve your issues, or a different house, or a different husband, or a different location, or a different job, or different friends, or a different extended family.
God. Just God. He's all we need. Seek Him, and his peace. Feel his sufficiency. Envelope yourself with it.
Memorize this: " He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart." Isaiah 40
Memorize this: "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
The Jeremiah verse literally popped into my head yesterday while I watched my children eat lunch together on the little preschool table in our playroom. The dining room table was littered with a collage project. We weren't finished and clearing it for lunch didn't make sense. So although I don't like them to eat in the playroom, it made sense yesterday.
Baby Beth was in heaven, I tell you. I put her in the preschool chair and she fit perfectly. She looked so proud! Her face lit up and sheer delight sparkled from her eyes. She felt like a big girl. Like an equal with her siblings, who were all sitting there with her. They giggled at her--sensing her big-girl delight.
They had the best time together, sitting there as one harmonious, happy unit.
I was blessed...not able to keep my eyes off them. I knew God was there, in that moment. The joyful sibling scene before me was from Him--a timely reminder of his blessings, of his faithfulness. Of the plans he has to prosper me (us). Not financially, but through relationship with him. Through closer relationship. Through more peace. Through greater clarity and wisdom.
Post Script: Oh, my. Reading this over a couple hours after writing it, I see tons of to be verbs. No time now, but later, I'll work on injecting beefy verbs.
I abhor the rise of prosperity gospel preachers. They teach a false, dangerous doctrine. A few months ago, while doing dishes, I listened to twenty minutes of Joel Olsteen. The word disgust doesn't begin to cover it! He didn't say a single thing that rang true, in regards to Biblical doctrine. Let's define these characters as mere motivational speakers--not Pastors or Biblical teachers.
An excellent sermon on the Jeremiah 29:11 passage can be found at www.expository.org/jer29a.htm. Much of this post comes from that teaching.
The English word "prosperity" is not a good match for the Hebrew word "shalom", which is the word used in Jeremiah 29:11. Correctly interpreting any passage of Scripture requires examining the Hebrew words and comparing them to the English words used in translation. Many times the match is far from precise, which is why we should all own a good study Bible. And why we need to choose a church carefully, making sure the church leaders use historical context and the correct Hebrew meanings for any interpretational teaching.
So, what does "shalom" mean? It means peace. A larger definition brings in the ideas of completeness, wholeness, harmony, fulfillment, unimpaired relationship with others and with God.
If you're interested, the historical context of Jeremiah 29:11 is printed in red below. If you're not interested, skip over this red portion.
These are the words of the letter that Jeremiah the prophet sent from Jerusalem to the surviving elders of the exiles, and to the priests, the prophets, and all the people, whom Nebuchadnezzar had taken into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon. 2 This was after King Jeconiah and the queen mother, the eunuchs, the officials of Judah and Jerusalem, the craftsmen, and the metal workers had departed from Jerusalem. 3 The letter was sent by the hand of Elasah the son of Shaphan and Gemariah the son of Hilkiah, whom Zedekiah king of Judah sent to Babylon to Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon. It said: 4 "Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, to all the exiles whom I have sent into exile from Jerusalem to Babylon: 5 Build houses and live in them; plant gardens and eat their produce. 6 Take wives and have sons and daughters; take wives for your sons, and give your daughters in marriage, that they may bear sons and daughters; multiply there, and do not decrease. 7 But seek the welfare of the city where I have sent you into exile, and pray to the LORD on its behalf, for in its welfare you will find your welfare. 8 For thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel: Do not let your prophets and your diviners who are among you deceive you, and do not listen to the dreams that they dream, 9 for it is a lie that they are prophesying to you in my name; I did not send them, declares the LORD. 10 "For thus says the LORD: When seventy years are completed for Babylon, I will visit you, and I will fulfill to you my promise and bring you back to this place. 11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the LORD, plans for wholeness and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope. 12 Then you will call upon me and come and pray to me, and I will hear you. 13 You will seek me and find me. When you seek me with all your heart, 14 I will be found by you, declares the LORD, and I will restore your fortunes and gather you from all the nations and all the places where I have driven you, declares the LORD, and I will bring you back to the place from which I sent you into exile. 15 "Because you have said, 'The LORD has raised up prophets for us in Babylon,' 16 thus says the LORD concerning the king who sits on the throne of David, and concerning all the people who dwell in this city, your kinsmen who did not go out with you into exile: 17 'Thus says the LORD of hosts, behold, I am sending on them sword, famine, and pestilence, and I will make them like vile figs that are so rotten they cannot be eaten. 18 I will pursue them with sword, famine, and pestilence, and will make them a horror to all the kingdoms of the earth, to be a curse, a terror, a hissing, and a reproach among all the nations where I have driven them, 19 because they did not pay attention to my words, declares the LORD, that I persistently sent to you by my servants the prophets, but you would not listen, declares the LORD.' 20 Hear the word of the LORD, all you exiles whom I sent away from Jerusalem to Babylon: 21 'Thus says the LORD of hosts, the God of Israel, concerning Ahab the son of Kolaiah and Zedekiah the son of Maaseiah, who are prophesying a lie to you in my name: Behold, I will deliver them into the hand of Nebuchadnezzar king of Babylon, and he shall strike them down before your eyes. 22 Because of them this curse shall be used by all the exiles from Judah in Babylon: "The LORD make you like Zedekiah and Ahab, whom the king of Babylon roasted in the fire," 23 because they have done an outrageous thing in Israel, they have committed adultery with their neighbors' wives, and they have spoken in my name lying words that I did not command them. I am the one who knows, and I am witness, declares the LORD.' (Jeremiah 29:1-23 ESV)
Each use of the word "prosperity" refers to God's close relationship with his people, even in exile. This is the primary sense of the word shalom--peace, intimacy, unhindered relationship with God. God is working out His purposes even during the tragedies of His people. Nothing is pointless; nothing is out from under God's control.
Isaiah 40 tells us:
He tends his flock like a sheperd: He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart; he gently leads those that have young.
Currently, our van is doing something new. Our mechanic doesn't own the $80,000 diagnostic machine needed to correctly analyze the problem. So today, we have it at the Toyota dealer, spending the $60 necessary to have it analyzed. It could be the transmission, or another extremely expensive repair. Or, perhaps it's something simpler. Rebuilding a transmission is a couple thousand and our mechanic doesn't think it's worth doing on such an old van. My husband quickly let him know that a new used van is not in the cards. We HAVE to keep this van running. This is even more important right now than staying current on the house payment, which has been our primary focus during this job hunt/financial crisis.
This whole post endeavors to drive this point home: Our earthly lives are typically full of curve balls. Things ebb and flow, of course, but the curves keep on coming. My issues are different than yours, but still, everyone has issues.
Issues that seem really hard to handle.
Issues that can drag on and on, making us wonder where God is in the midst of our struggles.
Jeremiah 29:11 speaks of the peace we have in relationship with God.
THAT IS ENOUGH.
It truly is.
Don't be deceived, thinking that a better income will solve your issues, or a different house, or a different husband, or a different location, or a different job, or different friends, or a different extended family.
God. Just God. He's all we need. Seek Him, and his peace. Feel his sufficiency. Envelope yourself with it.
Memorize this: " He gathers the lambs in his arms and carries them close to his heart." Isaiah 40
Memorize this: "For I know the plans I have for you", declares the Lord, "Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11
The Jeremiah verse literally popped into my head yesterday while I watched my children eat lunch together on the little preschool table in our playroom. The dining room table was littered with a collage project. We weren't finished and clearing it for lunch didn't make sense. So although I don't like them to eat in the playroom, it made sense yesterday.
Baby Beth was in heaven, I tell you. I put her in the preschool chair and she fit perfectly. She looked so proud! Her face lit up and sheer delight sparkled from her eyes. She felt like a big girl. Like an equal with her siblings, who were all sitting there with her. They giggled at her--sensing her big-girl delight.
They had the best time together, sitting there as one harmonious, happy unit.
I was blessed...not able to keep my eyes off them. I knew God was there, in that moment. The joyful sibling scene before me was from Him--a timely reminder of his blessings, of his faithfulness. Of the plans he has to prosper me (us). Not financially, but through relationship with him. Through closer relationship. Through more peace. Through greater clarity and wisdom.
Post Script: Oh, my. Reading this over a couple hours after writing it, I see tons of to be verbs. No time now, but later, I'll work on injecting beefy verbs.
Monday, January 4, 2010
editing for fun
Earlier today I read something quite depressing about the writing industry. Ready for it? Even if you publish a book, or two, you can still generally make more money flipping hamburgers. Yes, there are exceptions, such as J.K. Rollings and Sarah Palin. But most of us aren't exceptional.
It isn't that I had dreams of making a lot of money. Selling articles--should any magazine ever publish something of mine--might only bring in a few hundred a month. I knew that.
I just find it disconcerting that although the world cannot live without authors, child-care workers, or elderly-care workers, all three are among the lowest-paid professions. What's wrong with that? These hard-working people provide us with inspiration, love and knowledge.
The bottom line is this: If you want to do something fulfilling--truly fulfilling--don't expect much of a paycheck. Your fulfillment is your compensation. That works fine so long as someone else in the household pays the bills.
Anyhow, lately I've been hanging out at Mary DeMuth's blogs--namely her writing-tutorial blog, linked below and featured on my side bar. She recently began providing paragraphs for aspiring writers (or non-published writers) to edit.
The paragraph below appears in the fiction work, Twilight. I hadn't heard of this book until recently, but apparently it sells quite well. Poor-quality writing to be sure, but apparently the author knows how to weave a tale. Good storytelling sells books.
I wanted to take a stab at the editing.
So You Want to Be Published: YOUR TURN: contemporary published work
It was unusually foggy; the air was almost smoky with it. The mist was ice cold where it clung to the exposed skin on my face and neck. I couldn't wait to get the heat going in my truck. It was such a thick fog that I was a few feet down the driveway before I realized there was a car in it: a silver car.
from Twilight, page 197
Christine's attempt at editing:
Weak verbs (shown in blue) weigh this wordy paragraph down. As well, the piece tells, rather than shows. I'm still reading and learning about both of these writing issues myself. Here is my attempt at an edit (rewrite):
Thick, smoky fog hung in the air. Ice-cold mist clung to my exposed face and neck. Hands shivering, I unlocked my truck--impatient for its soothing heat. Engine revving, I paused for some warmth, then started down the driveway, nearly hitting a car enveloped by the fog. A silver car.
Now in reading Mrs. Piggle Wiggle's Farm (Betty MacDonald, 1954) to the boys last night, I noticed several groups of sentences with weak verbs--some containing as many to be verbs as shown above. Now, I regard Betty MacDonald as a master storyteller and excellent writer. Always engaging, her sentences flow beautifully and she "shows" scenes superbly. You feel as though you are in the scene; she's that good. So some passive sentences work; there just can't be so many that they overwhelm a piece. Is that correct, Stephanie from Canada? I think you do some editing, yes? What's your opinion on weak verbs/passive sentences?
Okay, so that's it for tonight; a pretty boring post if you aren't into writing as a craft. Mary DeMuth encourages aspiring writers to put in their 10,000 hours of practice. You can't hope to be exceptional at something unless you invest countless hours perfecting it.
I think I know solid advice when I hear it. That's plenty solid.
I will definitely live it. And really, it won't be difficult. I can't NOT write; life is processed, for me, through writing.
It isn't that I had dreams of making a lot of money. Selling articles--should any magazine ever publish something of mine--might only bring in a few hundred a month. I knew that.
I just find it disconcerting that although the world cannot live without authors, child-care workers, or elderly-care workers, all three are among the lowest-paid professions. What's wrong with that? These hard-working people provide us with inspiration, love and knowledge.
The bottom line is this: If you want to do something fulfilling--truly fulfilling--don't expect much of a paycheck. Your fulfillment is your compensation. That works fine so long as someone else in the household pays the bills.
Anyhow, lately I've been hanging out at Mary DeMuth's blogs--namely her writing-tutorial blog, linked below and featured on my side bar. She recently began providing paragraphs for aspiring writers (or non-published writers) to edit.
The paragraph below appears in the fiction work, Twilight. I hadn't heard of this book until recently, but apparently it sells quite well. Poor-quality writing to be sure, but apparently the author knows how to weave a tale. Good storytelling sells books.
I wanted to take a stab at the editing.
So You Want to Be Published: YOUR TURN: contemporary published work
It was unusually foggy; the air was almost smoky with it. The mist was ice cold where it clung to the exposed skin on my face and neck. I couldn't wait to get the heat going in my truck. It was such a thick fog that I was a few feet down the driveway before I realized there was a car in it: a silver car.
from Twilight, page 197
Christine's attempt at editing:
Weak verbs (shown in blue) weigh this wordy paragraph down. As well, the piece tells, rather than shows. I'm still reading and learning about both of these writing issues myself. Here is my attempt at an edit (rewrite):
Thick, smoky fog hung in the air. Ice-cold mist clung to my exposed face and neck. Hands shivering, I unlocked my truck--impatient for its soothing heat. Engine revving, I paused for some warmth, then started down the driveway, nearly hitting a car enveloped by the fog. A silver car.
Now in reading Mrs. Piggle Wiggle's Farm (Betty MacDonald, 1954) to the boys last night, I noticed several groups of sentences with weak verbs--some containing as many to be verbs as shown above. Now, I regard Betty MacDonald as a master storyteller and excellent writer. Always engaging, her sentences flow beautifully and she "shows" scenes superbly. You feel as though you are in the scene; she's that good. So some passive sentences work; there just can't be so many that they overwhelm a piece. Is that correct, Stephanie from Canada? I think you do some editing, yes? What's your opinion on weak verbs/passive sentences?
Okay, so that's it for tonight; a pretty boring post if you aren't into writing as a craft. Mary DeMuth encourages aspiring writers to put in their 10,000 hours of practice. You can't hope to be exceptional at something unless you invest countless hours perfecting it.
I think I know solid advice when I hear it. That's plenty solid.
I will definitely live it. And really, it won't be difficult. I can't NOT write; life is processed, for me, through writing.
Sunday, January 3, 2010
hodpodge thoughts
All my one year olds carried things around, dropping them in this room or that, only to pick up something else and continue on. I'm not kidding when I say that, though cute, it makes me feel like crying sometimes. Feels like I'll never be free of clutter, no matter how hard I try.
A friend of ours came by last week, briefly, and must have seen the disarray--hard not to on that particular day. He came by again on Friday and didn't come in, EVEN THOUGH THE HOUSE WAS CLEAN, AND I WAS HOPING TO REDEEM MYSELF! Ugh!
My baby loves baskets. Her older sister was the same way at this same age. Now big sis pushes little sis around. Oh, the squeals of delight that brings! Happy days. Crazy days! I wouldn't have it any other way, despite my lamenting about the house.
This is what a one year old can do to a room in twenty minutes. The other side is even worse. God help me! I just want to sip cocoa after they go to bed! And read. Or write. Not find homes for hundreds of stray items. Anything but that.
Mary, "reading" a predictable book. I love predictable books and pattern books! They make even the most timid child feel like a reader. Awesome! (As Mary says.)
Beth joins in here (left corner). Hard to get a focused picture of these two. They love to move just as I want to snap.
Baby Beth likes to get on my lap while I read to the boys, and pretend to read by moving her index finger across the words. It amazes me that at her age she understands this much about reading--that the words carry the message.
Forgive Daddy for his wild shirt. Do you think I should lose it under the bed--or something?
Don't get the impression she sits still for very long--just for a couple pages at a time, so far.
To be so loved! Peter and Mary especially love this little Missy.
Paul is often in his own little mathematical world, head in the clouds, adding numbers in his head (just for fun). I need paper to add what his head easily manages. I love it when he asks me if he's right--as though of course I would know, since I'm an adult. He has little idea of how precocious his figuring is. Hopefully, he stays humble. Gifted kids (he probably is gifted) can get a big head sometimes, once they understand that others don't think like they do, or grasp things as easily. I've seen them also try to play dumb, so people won't think they're weird. Of course they want to fit in, like everyone else. Being different can get lonely.
I pray that as with Peter's ADHD, we say the right things--showing them both they're fearfully and wonderfully made, by an awesome God, who has awesome plans for their lives.
Blessings to count:
- My husband, and Peter, Paul, Mary and Beth. They sure color my days happy!
- The opportunity to heal, and leave behind a sense of isolation.
I wrote an e-mail to my pastor, running some things by him in relation to that relative I spoke of, who has a drinking problem. He thought my "detachment with love" approach sounded quite good; we will meet to discuss the matter. The Al Anon website really helped me understand my upbringing and my sense of isolation (isolation results from shame about family secrets). If you have dealt with substance abuse in a parent, or sibling, or other relative close to you, I highly recommend visiting the site, even if you aren't sure the problem qualifies as alcoholism or addiction. You need to make sure your decisions and your relationship patterns aren't still tied to unhealthy enabling patterns from the past. Make sure you give it to God! Christ's love can make up for insufficient parental love. You'll still wish the past could have been different, but you won't be tied to it.
- Church today--wonderful sermon
- Cuddling in bed this morning, with three of my sweeties, and with my Honey. No greater start to the day than that. Giggles and cuddles--the things kid-filled days are made of.
- Mrs. Piggle Wiggle stories, to delight my boys, and bring laughter to our nights
-The number of times Mary wants to hear The Three Little Pigs. I love it that she has her favorites. She'll soon be able to tell these tales herself!
- Mushrooms in my spaghetti sauce tonight, sautéed by my Honey.
- Beth is slowly getting her last two front teeth--making it a grand total of eight teeth now. Do I have a good night's sleep to look forward to....soon?
- Tomorrow starts the first full day of school we've had since Christmas break started. We've done one or two things every day for learning, but not full days. My ADHD son's behavior has suffered (lack of routine). Tomorrow will be a blessing for everyone! Routine is a drug in itself--a very effective one. Even the weekends can be difficult!
Saturday, January 2, 2010
some resolutions
Happy New Year!
I've tried a few times to write a post lately, but interruptions abound. I'll try again now, with some New Year's Resolutions.
I've been dwelling a lot lately on the concept of focus. It's hard to describe the difficulty I have with this! Mothering a one year old is just plain hard! Loaded with blessing, of course, but hard too. Add a three year old to the mix, and another child with ADHD, and life becomes a whirlwind, spinning Momma hither and yon. The sudden smelly diaper, a spontaneous spill, the dreaded dryer buzzer, the request for a drink, a snack, a bottle of glue.......the list goes on. Why did I come down the hall? Something needed fetching...what was it again? A roll of papertowels? A lightbulb? A washcloth? What was it, for heaven's sake?
Sound familiar, Mommas? Sometimes I wonder if I, too, have ADHD. Then I reject that notion, concluding instead that it's the season of life I'm in. And also the fact that introspective people often get sidetracked; I definitely fall into the introspective category.
Whatever the reason, I need to conquer this lack of focus. Legacy-leaving parenting is intentional, not drifting. My Raising Godly Tomatoes goals, my Scripture memorizing goals, and other goals, depend on focus.
A crazy solution popped into my head this morning, following a few weeks of prayer. An apron! Yes...a pocketed apron.
I will wear it to carry:
- Token behavior system dollars, which work so well with Peter's ADHD, WHEN I remember to give them out right away. Carrying them with me will help enormously.
- Scripture verses, written on index cards. They will redirect me when I feel overwhelmed or angry.
- Math flash cards, which work best when used VERY often, for short periods.
- Stop watch, to time my three year old's potty trips. Otherwise, I forget to take her; she still lacks internal incentive. I'll change fewer diapers anyway, if I take her more often.
- A note pad, to record things we need at the store. I used to remember everything we lacked, without fail. Not so anymore; insufficient sleep affects my memory.
I'll probably think of other uses for the apron, but that's it for now.
New Year's Resolutions
1. Trust God more
James 1:6 But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. Parenting is a heavy burden; the stakes are high. But how my children turn out depends so little on me. If I pray for help with problematic issues, I have to then lay the issues at the Lord's feet, and trust Him...letting him raise the children through me.
2. Be quiet
James 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. I will be a better mother and wife if I remember this! Two of my children have affirming words as their love language, and they especially, need me to exercise restraint with the tongue--spewing only kind words, constructive words.
3. Ask for wisdom more often--this is tied to number 1.
James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. As soon as I begin to stress about an issue, I need to take it to the Lord. I made some progress with this in the last few months, and that progress needs to continue. My flesh wants to ruminate for a while, and then take it to the Lord.
4. Be steadfast
James 1:12 Blessed are those who presevere under trial, because when they have stood the test, they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. As a perfectionist, I often live with an all or nothing mentality. If I can't do something as well as I want, I don't do it at all. I lack steadfastness, due to frustration. With this Scripture under my belt--and in my apron--I can redirect my perfectionist tendencies and remember to stay on the path.
5. Learn about the writing industry; practice writing queries, and meeting fake deadlines. As soon as Anna is sleeping through the night, and I am guaranteed some regular, restorative sleep, I need to attempt to earn some money, hopefully from writing articles.
6. Move aerobically regularly; lift weights As an older mom, I can't neglect this, if I want to see my granchildren. Even if it's just jumping rope for twenty minutes, or dancing; I need to exercise. I bought an exercise video, but doing it requires uninterrupted time. If this endeavor is important to God, he will provide uninterrupted time this winter. Other seasons provide more opportunity to exercise with my children.
That's it for this year. How are your resolutions shaping up?
I've tried a few times to write a post lately, but interruptions abound. I'll try again now, with some New Year's Resolutions.
I've been dwelling a lot lately on the concept of focus. It's hard to describe the difficulty I have with this! Mothering a one year old is just plain hard! Loaded with blessing, of course, but hard too. Add a three year old to the mix, and another child with ADHD, and life becomes a whirlwind, spinning Momma hither and yon. The sudden smelly diaper, a spontaneous spill, the dreaded dryer buzzer, the request for a drink, a snack, a bottle of glue.......the list goes on. Why did I come down the hall? Something needed fetching...what was it again? A roll of papertowels? A lightbulb? A washcloth? What was it, for heaven's sake?
Sound familiar, Mommas? Sometimes I wonder if I, too, have ADHD. Then I reject that notion, concluding instead that it's the season of life I'm in. And also the fact that introspective people often get sidetracked; I definitely fall into the introspective category.
Whatever the reason, I need to conquer this lack of focus. Legacy-leaving parenting is intentional, not drifting. My Raising Godly Tomatoes goals, my Scripture memorizing goals, and other goals, depend on focus.
A crazy solution popped into my head this morning, following a few weeks of prayer. An apron! Yes...a pocketed apron.
I will wear it to carry:
- Token behavior system dollars, which work so well with Peter's ADHD, WHEN I remember to give them out right away. Carrying them with me will help enormously.
- Scripture verses, written on index cards. They will redirect me when I feel overwhelmed or angry.
- Math flash cards, which work best when used VERY often, for short periods.
- Stop watch, to time my three year old's potty trips. Otherwise, I forget to take her; she still lacks internal incentive. I'll change fewer diapers anyway, if I take her more often.
- A note pad, to record things we need at the store. I used to remember everything we lacked, without fail. Not so anymore; insufficient sleep affects my memory.
I'll probably think of other uses for the apron, but that's it for now.
New Year's Resolutions
1. Trust God more
James 1:6 But he must ask in faith without any doubting, for the one who doubts is like the surf of the sea, driven and tossed by the wind. Parenting is a heavy burden; the stakes are high. But how my children turn out depends so little on me. If I pray for help with problematic issues, I have to then lay the issues at the Lord's feet, and trust Him...letting him raise the children through me.
2. Be quiet
James 1:19 My dear brothers, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak and slow to become angry. I will be a better mother and wife if I remember this! Two of my children have affirming words as their love language, and they especially, need me to exercise restraint with the tongue--spewing only kind words, constructive words.
3. Ask for wisdom more often--this is tied to number 1.
James 1:5 If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you. As soon as I begin to stress about an issue, I need to take it to the Lord. I made some progress with this in the last few months, and that progress needs to continue. My flesh wants to ruminate for a while, and then take it to the Lord.
4. Be steadfast
James 1:12 Blessed are those who presevere under trial, because when they have stood the test, they will receive the crown of life that God has promised to those who love him. As a perfectionist, I often live with an all or nothing mentality. If I can't do something as well as I want, I don't do it at all. I lack steadfastness, due to frustration. With this Scripture under my belt--and in my apron--I can redirect my perfectionist tendencies and remember to stay on the path.
5. Learn about the writing industry; practice writing queries, and meeting fake deadlines. As soon as Anna is sleeping through the night, and I am guaranteed some regular, restorative sleep, I need to attempt to earn some money, hopefully from writing articles.
6. Move aerobically regularly; lift weights As an older mom, I can't neglect this, if I want to see my granchildren. Even if it's just jumping rope for twenty minutes, or dancing; I need to exercise. I bought an exercise video, but doing it requires uninterrupted time. If this endeavor is important to God, he will provide uninterrupted time this winter. Other seasons provide more opportunity to exercise with my children.
That's it for this year. How are your resolutions shaping up?
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