Monday, June 14, 2010
why we must count
It's never a good idea for me to cry. Turns out it's a migraine trigger. But Ann Voskamp simply doesn't care about my migraines, darn her. She's gone and written an incredibly beautiful piece about why we must count our blessings. Why we must. We. simply. must.
It's a life boat essential.
My blessings:
- a husband who is true
- a husband full of grace
- a husband who loves me, in all my hormonal negativity (God help me--I become wholly different in my view of life for at least 48 hours. I can't find hope.)
- a nursing baby
- writers like Ann
- writing, to tell Jesus about the hurts
- four children who live passionately
- sufferers, taught by Jesus to comfort us, specifically
- monarch caterpillars and my son and husband who love them
- the ice cream stand behind which we can always find monarch caterpillars on the milkweed
- my food-loving, boy-chef eight year old who I sent to Google a homemade brownie recipe. Instead he brought me something with beef that he wants to make for dinner tonight (smile).
- the job interview my husband had today (no matter the outcome, interviews are good practice)
- my three-year-old sweetie, who pointed to a train picture and asked, "Does this begin with T?"
- rain, rain, more rain. It can be miserable, but it makes things lush...rich...beautiful.
- meal-time Scripture
____________________
As part of our meal-time Scripture, we've gone through Proverbs, Matthew, and we're still making our way through Psalms. Recently we also started Luke.
Today we came across this:
Luke 10:3,4
Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.
Can you imagine? What faith! Think of it for a moment.
Question: Would you have stuffed something in your pocket?
What would it have been?
- water?
- lipstick?
- chocolate?
- money?
- a knife?
I'm curious.
It's a life boat essential.
My blessings:
- a husband who is true
- a husband full of grace
- a husband who loves me, in all my hormonal negativity (God help me--I become wholly different in my view of life for at least 48 hours. I can't find hope.)
- a nursing baby
- writers like Ann
- writing, to tell Jesus about the hurts
- four children who live passionately
- sufferers, taught by Jesus to comfort us, specifically
- monarch caterpillars and my son and husband who love them
- the ice cream stand behind which we can always find monarch caterpillars on the milkweed
- my food-loving, boy-chef eight year old who I sent to Google a homemade brownie recipe. Instead he brought me something with beef that he wants to make for dinner tonight (smile).
- the job interview my husband had today (no matter the outcome, interviews are good practice)
- my three-year-old sweetie, who pointed to a train picture and asked, "Does this begin with T?"
- rain, rain, more rain. It can be miserable, but it makes things lush...rich...beautiful.
- meal-time Scripture
____________________
As part of our meal-time Scripture, we've gone through Proverbs, Matthew, and we're still making our way through Psalms. Recently we also started Luke.
Today we came across this:
Luke 10:3,4
Go! I am sending you out like lambs among wolves. Do not take a purse or bag or sandals; and do not greet anyone on the road.
Can you imagine? What faith! Think of it for a moment.
Question: Would you have stuffed something in your pocket?
What would it have been?
- water?
- lipstick?
- chocolate?
- money?
- a knife?
I'm curious.
dad's day
I never love my man more than when he's reading to the children. It always makes my heart whisper to my Lord, "Thank you, God, for a good man."
Bible verses about fathers, in honor of Father's Day.
And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.” [Malachi 4:6 ESV]
My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the LORD reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights. [Proverbs 3:11-12 ESV]
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. [Ephesians 6:4 ESV]
The righteous who walks in his integrity– blessed are his children after him! [Proverbs 20:7 ESV]
Bible verses about fathers, in honor of Father's Day.
And he will turn the hearts of fathers to their children and the hearts of children to their fathers, lest I come and strike the land with a decree of utter destruction.” [Malachi 4:6 ESV]
My son, do not despise the LORD’s discipline or be weary of his reproof, for the LORD reproves him whom he loves, as a father the son in whom he delights. [Proverbs 3:11-12 ESV]
Fathers, do not provoke your children to anger, but bring them up in the discipline and instruction of the Lord. [Ephesians 6:4 ESV]
The righteous who walks in his integrity– blessed are his children after him! [Proverbs 20:7 ESV]
When Father Reads the Book – By G.E. Foster
When we hurry off to work,
I’m reminded of those early times
When father read the Book.
When father read the Book
As we each our places took
Round the dear old family altar
When father read the Book
I’m reminded of those early times
When father read the Book.
When father read the Book
As we each our places took
Round the dear old family altar
When father read the Book
O those dear old Bible stories,
Psalms that flowed like rippling brook;
Warnings, promises, and precepts
Lived, as father read the Book.
As father read the Book.
Satan’s kingdom round us shook,
And our savior early claimed us
Because father read the Book.
Psalms that flowed like rippling brook;
Warnings, promises, and precepts
Lived, as father read the Book.
As father read the Book.
Satan’s kingdom round us shook,
And our savior early claimed us
Because father read the Book.
O they say it was old-fashioned,
And what waste of time ‘twould look
To now take half-an-hour
To let father read the Book,
But as father read the Book,
Blessed thought in our minds stuck;
And the day went so much better
Just ’cause father read the Book.
And what waste of time ‘twould look
To now take half-an-hour
To let father read the Book,
But as father read the Book,
Blessed thought in our minds stuck;
And the day went so much better
Just ’cause father read the Book.
Oft I’m troubled as I journey
On toward heav’n with upward look,
To see families all about me
Grow up without father’s Book
Let father read the Book;
Your home will be so different
If your father reads the Book.
On toward heav’n with upward look,
To see families all about me
Grow up without father’s Book
Let father read the Book;
Your home will be so different
If your father reads the Book.
I found the poem and verses here.
Some Father's Day Ideas.
In the photo they are actually reading Backyard Detective, Critters Up Close, by Nic Bishop.
Saturday, June 12, 2010
Right Where God Wants You
Pride.
Pride
Pride.
In my non-Christian past, I thought of pride as a mostly positive thing. It compelled me to fix my flat, lifeless hair with a curling iron....for thirty minutes. It compelled me to use make up and iron my clothes. Egad! Even my jeans. Yes, I was one of those girls, in days gone by. I never just pulled on any old thing.
Pride kept me at my best.....personally, professionally. Always.
You now the funny thing though?
I was so lost then.
Not outwardly so, but inwardly, very much. I didn't understand God. He was in the picture, but I didn't answer to him or know him or draw comfort, strength or wisdom from him.
Lost. Empty.
As I look back at that twenty-something woman, I remember a shy but mostly confident professional. A happy, but sometimes lonely, woman. Strong. Capable. Smart.
My old self certainly didn't look or seem broken.
Now for the kicker. The jaw dropper.
I actually feel, look, and seem more broken now, thirteen years into this Christian thingy.
- My husband is underemployed with an unimpressive resume that keeps getting more unimpressive the longer he remains underemployed.
- One of my kids has a disability that keeps us all on edge 24/7.
- My baby stopped sleeping for all practical purposes, and my six-year-old is revisiting a fear of monsters.
- My husband, as part of the working-poor segment of the population, works a whole lot and is gone a whole lot, all to bring home shockingly low wages.
- His schedule, and the sharing of a vehicle, means we can barely make time to go to a park--still a free activity--with our kids.
- We own a house but I don't know for how much longer.
- My children--the boys especially--are increasingly aware that things aren't going well, and I worry how that knowledge will affect their health, their happiness, and their relationships with God and with us.
- I am increasingly embarrassed and ashamed of our circumstances. I feel like I'm losing all my dignity.
- I went for several months without contact with my unsaved mother, and now we are occasionally e-mailing. She is appalled at our circumstances. And I, for my part, am wondering why God wouldn't want to impress the woman a little more, what with this Christian thingy going on in her daughter's life. Don't you want her saved, God? Shouldn't you give her a little hope that being a Christian is maybe a good thing?
- When this whole fiasco started in March, 2009, I went through shock and depression. But then I remembered that struggling builds character. And character is a great thing. A wonderful thing. I can handle this. I am strong. I can build character and be happy about it.
- I. am. so. over. that.
Once upon a time, I was a giddy new Christian. Peace and joy. It's all about peace and joy. I wanted to shout from the rooftops--PEACE AND JOY! Love God so you can have PEACE AND JOY.
- I. am. so. over. that.
Yes, I do still have peace and joy. And yes, they are a gift from God. Definitely not of myself.
But I no longer think the Christian life is about peace and joy, or at least not all the time.
So. What is it about, then?
Brokenness. My brokenness. My husband's brokenness. Our children's brokenness.
God gives the seasoned Christian clear vision. Very clear vision. Of our brokenness....of our utter hopeless state.
You know he's really getting to you, when you feel so broken you just want to run to your heavenly Daddy, and cry at his feet.
That is right where he wants you. He created you for His glory, not for your own. He created you to fellowship with Him. That is all he wants from you, in the final analysis.
So give it to Him. And be refreshed. You'll have that peace and joy thingy going on in no time, girl! Get up, right now. Go sit at his feet.
And later, read this really good piece about brokenness.
Pride
Pride.
In my non-Christian past, I thought of pride as a mostly positive thing. It compelled me to fix my flat, lifeless hair with a curling iron....for thirty minutes. It compelled me to use make up and iron my clothes. Egad! Even my jeans. Yes, I was one of those girls, in days gone by. I never just pulled on any old thing.
Pride kept me at my best.....personally, professionally. Always.
You now the funny thing though?
I was so lost then.
Not outwardly so, but inwardly, very much. I didn't understand God. He was in the picture, but I didn't answer to him or know him or draw comfort, strength or wisdom from him.
Lost. Empty.
As I look back at that twenty-something woman, I remember a shy but mostly confident professional. A happy, but sometimes lonely, woman. Strong. Capable. Smart.
My old self certainly didn't look or seem broken.
Now for the kicker. The jaw dropper.
I actually feel, look, and seem more broken now, thirteen years into this Christian thingy.
- My husband is underemployed with an unimpressive resume that keeps getting more unimpressive the longer he remains underemployed.
- One of my kids has a disability that keeps us all on edge 24/7.
- My baby stopped sleeping for all practical purposes, and my six-year-old is revisiting a fear of monsters.
- My husband, as part of the working-poor segment of the population, works a whole lot and is gone a whole lot, all to bring home shockingly low wages.
- His schedule, and the sharing of a vehicle, means we can barely make time to go to a park--still a free activity--with our kids.
- We own a house but I don't know for how much longer.
- My children--the boys especially--are increasingly aware that things aren't going well, and I worry how that knowledge will affect their health, their happiness, and their relationships with God and with us.
- I am increasingly embarrassed and ashamed of our circumstances. I feel like I'm losing all my dignity.
- I went for several months without contact with my unsaved mother, and now we are occasionally e-mailing. She is appalled at our circumstances. And I, for my part, am wondering why God wouldn't want to impress the woman a little more, what with this Christian thingy going on in her daughter's life. Don't you want her saved, God? Shouldn't you give her a little hope that being a Christian is maybe a good thing?
- When this whole fiasco started in March, 2009, I went through shock and depression. But then I remembered that struggling builds character. And character is a great thing. A wonderful thing. I can handle this. I am strong. I can build character and be happy about it.
- I. am. so. over. that.
Once upon a time, I was a giddy new Christian. Peace and joy. It's all about peace and joy. I wanted to shout from the rooftops--PEACE AND JOY! Love God so you can have PEACE AND JOY.
- I. am. so. over. that.
Yes, I do still have peace and joy. And yes, they are a gift from God. Definitely not of myself.
But I no longer think the Christian life is about peace and joy, or at least not all the time.
So. What is it about, then?
Brokenness. My brokenness. My husband's brokenness. Our children's brokenness.
God gives the seasoned Christian clear vision. Very clear vision. Of our brokenness....of our utter hopeless state.
You know he's really getting to you, when you feel so broken you just want to run to your heavenly Daddy, and cry at his feet.
That is right where he wants you. He created you for His glory, not for your own. He created you to fellowship with Him. That is all he wants from you, in the final analysis.
So give it to Him. And be refreshed. You'll have that peace and joy thingy going on in no time, girl! Get up, right now. Go sit at his feet.
And later, read this really good piece about brokenness.
In love with summer? Not.
It took my nursing toddler ninety minutes to fall asleep tonight! Consequently the boys didn't get their book time with Mommy. They barely got a kiss and tuck in, in fact, which makes me feel awful.
My now six-year-old boy, Paul, was just like this as a toddler. I consider him my easiest child to raise; let me say that up front. He took the lead with sleep issues for a long time, and it didn't spoil him. He is well liked by everyone and is just generally a great kid--very smart too. He works about two years above grade level and pretty much schools himself. He likes it that way.
I say all this not to brag, but to put to rest the notion that if you let your child lead in sleep issues, you'll end up with a spoiled child who has his parents wrapped around his tyrannical finger. Of the four children, Paul is the least spoiled.
Anyhow, Paul co-slept and night-nursed until two, which is when he began sleeping through the night. From six months old to two years old, he nursed every two hours at night. At two years old I put him in a twin bed with rail, sleeping in the same room as big brother. I would lie in his twin bed with him while he nursed to sleep. This worked fine, but at some point he began taking a very long time to fall asleep--60 to 90 minutes. He would get close to sleep, then make some movements to rouse himself. It was like my presence began to be a distraction, rather than a blessing. He wanted to stay awake to be with me, perhaps? This sudden sleep on-set problem wasn't related to a late nap, or to a lengthy nap, or to being overtired.
Once I was sure it was my presence, I had to began a program of bathing, reading, praying, singing, and nursing, then leaving the room with a final kiss and hug. Most of this routine was not new. We had been doing much of it for a while, except that he used to fall asleep nursing.
After we started this new procedure, he would come out to get me many times at first, sometimes crying. We got through it within a couple weeks. I just kept telling him I loved him and putting him back in bed with a kiss. This method is called the broken record routine, in which you calmly keep putting the child back in bed, with just a kiss, no matter how many times he comes out. He gave up nursing entirely at 2.5, due to my new pregnancy and significant morning sickness; there was no milk left. At that time we did everything else in the routine, leaving out the nursing. The sleep onset problem worked itself out.
Paul is an introspective person, like his Momma, and he occasionally still has trouble falling asleep, due to "thinking too much". He tells me he can't slow his thoughts down. 95% of the time however, he is asleep within fifteen minutes.
I have been an insomniac for many years off and on, although it rarely occurs when I'm nursing a baby, due to the relaxation hormones released during nursing.
Now back to my current baby, Beth. She was nearly sleeping through the night until recently, with the arrival of another teething bout. She also fell asleep easily until recently. Everything has changed; it's quite puzzling. It could just be the teeth, but I don't think that would cause such restlessness at bedtime. Her naps are reduced to about 45 minutes each, which is probably not enough daytime sleep. I will move her to one nap this week, to see if I can get her better rested. One nap of about 2 hours seems ideal for an 18-month-old baby, I would think, as long as bedtime falls early (around seven).
There was a period of about 8 days when she naturally moved to one nap of three hours, between 11:30 and 2:30. It vanished as suddenly as it appeared, about six weeks ago.
Anyhow, lately when I lie down to nurse her at bedtime, she is trying to rouse herself awake when she gets close to sleep, much like her brother did. Tossing, turning, laughing, talking, flirting. I think my presence is becoming a distraction for her as well.
She sleeps in a queen bed with a wall bordering one side of it, and a crib on the other side, to keep her from falling out. I nurse her to sleep, then go about my business in the evenings, going back in to nurse her back to sleep if she wakes. I also sleep in there all night to keep her from wandering the house and waking others. She climbs out of cribs readily, and has for a while, so the queen bed was the only solution; it is our only extra bed.
Her sister, Mary, sleeps in a twin bed in her brothers' room. There are three twin beds in there so it's crowded, but that arrangement will have to do until Mary is old enough to share a room with her little sister. At 3.5, we don't think Mary is mature enough. We're paranoid of an accidental smothering or something of that nature.
If I must let Beth begin to put herself to sleep, I will have to remove the box spring and frame and put the queen bed on the floor. I will have to get rid of the crib and take out a bookshelf and maybe a dresser, to make sure the room is completely baby-proofed. All of that will be a nightmare, since we don't have a garage or a basement. All three of the bedrooms are jam packed, as well as the closets.
Oh, bother. I hate sleep issues! They are so tedious. And with summer upon us, I am having issues with the boys too. They take longer to fall asleep in the summer. They love fireflies but the little buggers don't come out readily until 9:20 p.m., which makes for a late night for a 6 and 8 year old.
I let them catch fireflies last night, and they didn't fall asleep until 10:00 p.m, due to excitement and wanting to watch their two fireflies light up. Then this morning the eight year old got up at 6 a.m. instead of his usual 7:15 - 7:30 a.m. Being overtired worsened his ADHD today.
Really, to be honest? I can't wait for fall! I try to love summer for their sakes, but I just don't. Hassles abound, what with the sunscreen and the conflicting reports of which is best, and the wet towels, shoes, swimsuits, hats, and, of course, the ever-present mud and grass. Then there are the lemonade popsicles and juice boxes and the pleading to drink more water instead.
It can all add up to give Momma a big headache! Which I feel guilty about, since they absolutely love summer! I do enjoy seeing them so happy--don't get me wrong.
Anyhow, those are my issues. Thank you for listening. I hope things are smoother at your house.
My now six-year-old boy, Paul, was just like this as a toddler. I consider him my easiest child to raise; let me say that up front. He took the lead with sleep issues for a long time, and it didn't spoil him. He is well liked by everyone and is just generally a great kid--very smart too. He works about two years above grade level and pretty much schools himself. He likes it that way.
I say all this not to brag, but to put to rest the notion that if you let your child lead in sleep issues, you'll end up with a spoiled child who has his parents wrapped around his tyrannical finger. Of the four children, Paul is the least spoiled.
Anyhow, Paul co-slept and night-nursed until two, which is when he began sleeping through the night. From six months old to two years old, he nursed every two hours at night. At two years old I put him in a twin bed with rail, sleeping in the same room as big brother. I would lie in his twin bed with him while he nursed to sleep. This worked fine, but at some point he began taking a very long time to fall asleep--60 to 90 minutes. He would get close to sleep, then make some movements to rouse himself. It was like my presence began to be a distraction, rather than a blessing. He wanted to stay awake to be with me, perhaps? This sudden sleep on-set problem wasn't related to a late nap, or to a lengthy nap, or to being overtired.
Once I was sure it was my presence, I had to began a program of bathing, reading, praying, singing, and nursing, then leaving the room with a final kiss and hug. Most of this routine was not new. We had been doing much of it for a while, except that he used to fall asleep nursing.
After we started this new procedure, he would come out to get me many times at first, sometimes crying. We got through it within a couple weeks. I just kept telling him I loved him and putting him back in bed with a kiss. This method is called the broken record routine, in which you calmly keep putting the child back in bed, with just a kiss, no matter how many times he comes out. He gave up nursing entirely at 2.5, due to my new pregnancy and significant morning sickness; there was no milk left. At that time we did everything else in the routine, leaving out the nursing. The sleep onset problem worked itself out.
Paul is an introspective person, like his Momma, and he occasionally still has trouble falling asleep, due to "thinking too much". He tells me he can't slow his thoughts down. 95% of the time however, he is asleep within fifteen minutes.
I have been an insomniac for many years off and on, although it rarely occurs when I'm nursing a baby, due to the relaxation hormones released during nursing.
Now back to my current baby, Beth. She was nearly sleeping through the night until recently, with the arrival of another teething bout. She also fell asleep easily until recently. Everything has changed; it's quite puzzling. It could just be the teeth, but I don't think that would cause such restlessness at bedtime. Her naps are reduced to about 45 minutes each, which is probably not enough daytime sleep. I will move her to one nap this week, to see if I can get her better rested. One nap of about 2 hours seems ideal for an 18-month-old baby, I would think, as long as bedtime falls early (around seven).
There was a period of about 8 days when she naturally moved to one nap of three hours, between 11:30 and 2:30. It vanished as suddenly as it appeared, about six weeks ago.
Anyhow, lately when I lie down to nurse her at bedtime, she is trying to rouse herself awake when she gets close to sleep, much like her brother did. Tossing, turning, laughing, talking, flirting. I think my presence is becoming a distraction for her as well.
She sleeps in a queen bed with a wall bordering one side of it, and a crib on the other side, to keep her from falling out. I nurse her to sleep, then go about my business in the evenings, going back in to nurse her back to sleep if she wakes. I also sleep in there all night to keep her from wandering the house and waking others. She climbs out of cribs readily, and has for a while, so the queen bed was the only solution; it is our only extra bed.
Her sister, Mary, sleeps in a twin bed in her brothers' room. There are three twin beds in there so it's crowded, but that arrangement will have to do until Mary is old enough to share a room with her little sister. At 3.5, we don't think Mary is mature enough. We're paranoid of an accidental smothering or something of that nature.
If I must let Beth begin to put herself to sleep, I will have to remove the box spring and frame and put the queen bed on the floor. I will have to get rid of the crib and take out a bookshelf and maybe a dresser, to make sure the room is completely baby-proofed. All of that will be a nightmare, since we don't have a garage or a basement. All three of the bedrooms are jam packed, as well as the closets.
Oh, bother. I hate sleep issues! They are so tedious. And with summer upon us, I am having issues with the boys too. They take longer to fall asleep in the summer. They love fireflies but the little buggers don't come out readily until 9:20 p.m., which makes for a late night for a 6 and 8 year old.
I let them catch fireflies last night, and they didn't fall asleep until 10:00 p.m, due to excitement and wanting to watch their two fireflies light up. Then this morning the eight year old got up at 6 a.m. instead of his usual 7:15 - 7:30 a.m. Being overtired worsened his ADHD today.
Really, to be honest? I can't wait for fall! I try to love summer for their sakes, but I just don't. Hassles abound, what with the sunscreen and the conflicting reports of which is best, and the wet towels, shoes, swimsuits, hats, and, of course, the ever-present mud and grass. Then there are the lemonade popsicles and juice boxes and the pleading to drink more water instead.
It can all add up to give Momma a big headache! Which I feel guilty about, since they absolutely love summer! I do enjoy seeing them so happy--don't get me wrong.
Anyhow, those are my issues. Thank you for listening. I hope things are smoother at your house.
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