Friday, November 11, 2011

When You Ask God to Use You

I'm not an evangelist. For me, words of witness come after an opportunity passes.

My husband is the bold one. Last weekend he took our older three for a visit to a homeschool friend's house. A couple neighbor girls Elizabeth invited over began talking about childish superstitions, such as if you break your necklace, you get bad luck. More disturbing, they talked about seeing a bloody Mary in a mirror. One of them insisted she skinned her knee five times after breaking her necklace.

My husband told the girls boldly that "we believe in Jesus, not in superstitions."

Later at home, we sat down with the prayer jar, adding the girls' names (for them to know Truth).

I expressed how happy I was that Daddy mentioned Jesus. God gives us opportunities such as these to share our faith, I told them.

Paul, who is shy, was nearly in tears. "I don't think I could ever say what Daddy said."

I told him Mommy is also shy and not very bold. I added another prayer in the jar, asking God to make us all bold.

Knowing evangelism wasn't natural for me, I told God more than once over the years........"Please use me. If not my evangelistic words, then my life."

On Wednesday we went to Beth's physical therapy appointment. Her therapist, who has a European accent (a low percentage of Europeans have faith), was at first a bit overwhelmed that three other children were along for the appointments. The kids behave, but still, four is a lot of little people.

From Pew Research: 
Either way, popular attitudes toward religion in Europe now stand in bold contrast to those in the United States. While 59 percent of Americans say that religion is very important in their lives, only 11 percent of the French, 21 percent of Germans, and 33 percent of Britons do, according to the Pew Research Center.  Excerpt from this article: http://www.usnews.com/usnews/culture/articles/050530/30europe.htm

This time, because of Beth's flare, the therapist lovingly wrapped my daughter's knees with gauze dipped in hot, liquid paraffin wax. If Beth responded well (she did), the therapist planned to carry on the normal therapy routine that day.



Beth is a sweet girl and she particularly likes doctors (she calls Bea her therapist doctor, only she says this without the th and s sounds, if you can imagine that). Of all my children, Beth is the best candidate for a chronic pain disorder. God knew who He could use. Of course He did.

On this, our second visit, Bea was not overwhelmed by the four children. She was charmed. Peter, Paul, and Mary worked together to entertain Beth, who sat with wax gauze and towels wrapped around her knees for twenty minutes.

Beth was responsive, full of laughter and vitality and charm. Bea gave her a piece of wax to play with, and the children marveled at how fast it hardened. We talked about heat expanding molecules, like when an ice cube melts. When you take away the heat source, the molecules get closer together again. Thus, the liquid wax hardens.

Beth played with it, making many different shapes. Peter said, "That looks just like one of Mommy's tampons!" (Beth unwraps and plays with them occasionally, so they all know what they look like.)


Yes he did, folks. 


Driving home from the appointment and reflecting on Bea being charmed by the children--especially by sweet Beth--I marveled at how God uses us. I'm not an evangelist, but I am a Momma. I am discipling these children, keeping them from the world's stain, so they'll be set apart for God. And this, not of my self. Through Him, working in spite of me, not because of me.

With their simple faith, children speak volumes about God.

Along with her siblings, Beth will shine a light-giving faith, to her caregivers, throughout the course of this disease. God will use her condition to change hearts. To soften them. To cause them to reflect....what makes these particular children so happy? Why do they seem different?

It doesn't matter that we are imperfect, stained. He seems to orchestrate that their sweetest moments, always come at doctors' offices.

Now I know why. (Our regular doctor is from India, and he sees Peter regularly, because of ADHD, OCD and the tic disorder, Tourette's.)

Paul is healthy, but sees an ENT every few months to have ear wax removed. All these conditions and appointments? Not an accident. I'm sure of this now.

When I prayed....God, use me....I didn't expect it to take this form. A form that involves pain for my child, sleepless nights for both of us, and a young body full of anti-inflammatory medication.....not to mention another child with serious issues.

But today, I am prepared to say...thank you, God. Thank you for using us.

What a privilege.




Thursday, November 10, 2011

Out Of My League

A good friend e-mailed me, asking if I wanted the contact information for her college friend, whose 3-year-old daughter has JRA.

I said yes, but I sat on the information for a while. Finally, today, I e-mailed her friend, asking about arthritis flares. What causes them? Can I prevent them?

The Internet couldn't help me with this question.

I'm shy. Did I ever mention that? Writing a complete stranger doesn't appeal to me. But neither does too little information.

Ask my husband. Information arms me. To a fault. He doesn't understand how anyone could love research. I never actually said I loved it, mind you. He declared that. And I admit it's true. I'm a research junky.

The reply was very quick. From a Blackberry. She was very outgoing, nice and gracious. She wrote a few paragraphs, then asked if I could call her...she'd love to help me figure out the JRA maze. Or was I on Facebook?

Oh, boy, I thought. She writes me from a Blackberry--I type this word as though I know what a Blackberry is, do you notice that--and asks me if I'm on Facebook.

I'm out of my league. In the second e-mail--still very gracious, interested, and out-going (Did I mention I'm shy?)--she said I could call her or text her.

Text her?

Do people actually have conversations on Facebook, or just post things? I didn't know it was like e-mail. Come to think of it, if it's like e-mail, then, well, what's wrong with just using e-mail? Why is e-mail out of vogue?

And isn't texting like e-mail? I've never done it, but isn't it just typing a message to someone? Who wants to type one-fingered, using keys so tiny, I can barely make contact with them, let alone see them with my forty-plus eyes? Why is this in vogue?

So, if texting is like e-mail, only harder, then...what's wrong with e-mail?

Don't even get me started on ipads, ipods, iphones, and Kindles (what's wrong with books? Is turning pages out of vogue?).

Did I leave any i-thing out? And are ipads and ipods actually phones? Or is the iphone the only phone?  If you have an ipod or ipad or Blackberry, do you still need a cell phone? Or are they out of vogue?

I clearly don't belong in this era.

To be continued....little one keeps waking up. My topic wasn't going to be technology, interestingly enough.




Wednesday, November 9, 2011

A Witness Of His Grace

I have more blessings, but time is short tonight. Little one keeps waking up, which goes along with JRA.


~ One of my great mothering love affairs? Paints, brushes, and the minds and hearts of my children caught on paper, to be saved as a slice of childhood, and a slice of motherhood. Always a privilege.  When I'm an empty-nester, their treasured paintings will be part of my everyday salvation. This Momma finds money for paint, no matter what. God knows my heart, and he makes up the difference. 


My sweet boy turned 8 a few days ago. An aspiring artist, he asked for the fancy kind of watercolors for his birthday. This boy? How he blesses me!

This is tempura paint. A flower, by Mary.

Tempura paint again. A fall tree, sun and grass. By Paul.

Another famous abstract. Poster paint. By Mary.
~ Nursing my fussy Beth today in the rocker, I suddenly laughed out loud. Quite the belly laugh. The funny Boo Mama post I'd read that morning, with the picture of the lodge chair and the backpack and the water bottle--all a scheme to alert these women of nighttime jungle monkey invaders--was too much. I couldn't think of it without laughing. All day. Miss Beth, surprised but delighted at my antics, laughed with me, asking what was so funny. Ouch. Note to self: Don't make nursing toddlers, with mouths full of teeth, laugh. 


It felt so good to see her laughing! It blesses me that she laughs readily, despite her recent life change. Her laughter reminds me of this truth: Grace isn't a change of circumstances. It's a change of heart about those circumstances--a gift of the Holy Spirit. That's why I sit here and write now, as the Holy Spirit's witness. I'm not going to bed downtrodden, from depression over an arthritis flare. I'm going to bed with my head full of blessings. Full of thanksgiving.


Psalm 28:7
The LORD is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and I am helped. My heart leaps for joy and I will give thanks to him in song.


   

Tuesday, November 8, 2011

Laugh Until You Cry Today

Boo Mama, who went to Uganda with Compassion Bloggers a few years ago, doesn't like nature. Understatement. She wrote the funniest post back in 2008 about a night she spent in her Ugandan lodge. I'm not familiar with Boo Mama's blog, but I found this link recently on both Shaun's and Ann's blogs. Boo Mama is with them this week in the jungle of Ecuador (featuring humongous snakes and spiders the size of dinner plates), so they posted this to give us a giggle.

I laughed until I cried. You need this today.


Miss Beth's arthritis is flaring, so I really, really needed a giggle today. Initially, I was optimistic about her diagnosis, because so much of the literature is optimistic. But as we live this and I see the medication give her only modest relief, I grieve anew. This is a long haul with no guarantees. I was hoping she wouldn't need anything stronger than the naproxen. Now, I wonder what the doctor will say next week, as she evaluates Beth's month-long progress on the naproxen.

I will step back here this week to give thanks, but otherwise take a break.

Monday, November 7, 2011

When You Want More Of Something

My husband made a couple decisions lately that have changed our everyday reality. First, he increased our church giving. Next, he sponsored a child from El Salvador. 


Have you noticed I haven't whined about car repairs in recent weeks? There haven't been any. God blessed my husband's faith and obedience.


If you want more of something, give it away, whether it's time, money, love, prayer...it doesn't matter. If you want or need more, give. It not only changes the numbers, it changes the heart.


Compassion Bloggers will be in Ecuador November 8 - 12. Compassion's staff in Ecuador recently wrote a blog post on the country's ministry. Below, I've excerpted one small part. The article is excellent--comprehensive and most helpful.


Here are the main challenges in the region, as detailed in the blog post:


Unique Challenges


One challenge we face in Ecuador is the high number of broken families. Many mothers are head of their home, and many fathers have multiple homes and families. This results in even more extreme poverty as the fathers cannot provide for multiple households.

Poverty often leads to abuse, and many women are victims of abuse from the men in their lives. Many children in Ecuador are being raised in this environment, which interferes with healthy development particularly with their sense of confidence and self-esteem.

Other challenges in Ecuador are a the lack of job opportunities, low quality of education, lack of access to adequate health care, an increase in the number of child workers, and child abuse in homes and other environments.


Courtesy of Compassion International: http://blog.compassion.com/facts-about-ecuador-ministry-highlight-ecuador/#ixzz1d1jGZuxr

Can you use your prayer jar for these requests this week and month?  Thank you!


Pray for:


- blogger team unity and safety (it's jungle out there, literally, with big bugs and snakes)


- for many hearts to be changed by the exposure to abject poverty


- for many children to gain sponsors who will faithfully write to them.


- for strengthened, intact family units in Ecuador 


- for an end to child abuse, and abuse of mothers


- for the Holy Spirit to grab hold of the impoverished men, and release them from Satan's grip.


- that all following, including our children, will develop hearts rich in gratitude. These trips are a great discipling tool!


Here is the blogger team, all alumni, which includes Ann Voskamp and her husband, The Farmer. 


As you read this week's posts, remember, if you want more of something, give it away.


Compassion Bloggers: Ecuador 2011