Learning His Ways

The timer beeps every ten minutes and I give 2 teaspoons of liquid. When she sips an ounce serving from a cup, she vomits. So we live slow.


"Life is so hard," my mind whines, as I rinse out the medicine dropper yet again. Day six and another incident of vomiting again this morning. And Mary? She's my hero. Anyone else would come unglued by now--no food, no energy, no fun. And wondering if it will ever end. When will life be normal again? I remember the depression of illness. The personal, bodily lows teach us to give thanks for the gift of today, for the gift of wellness.


She endures with nary a complaint. "She's like you", my husband remarks, when I tell him what a strong daughter we have. "Stubborn like you, too", he chuckles.


Yes, I see the resemblance. Stubborn people have strength. We're both prone to anxiety, yet have steady endurance that surprises everyone.


Husband and I sometimes feel like Job. Often, so many things go wrong at once. We wait for the downhill after the long uphill, but it never comes. What is the purpose, I wonder? What are we to learn? I always seek the meaning of the lesson...to get it over with quickly, I suppose.  


~ When life is lived in ten-minute intervals, I learn how easy time runs away. 


~ When I must recite Psalm 23 many times a day to control my body's response to stress, I learn to access His power. The power of the Word.


~ When I watch my daughter grow stronger as she gets weaker, I learn who she is on a deeper level. I appreciate the wonder of her. I see the beauty and strength God gifted her with.


~ While the laundry piles high and the folding piles grow even higher, I stop to hug my daughter and pray strength into her. To kiss her beautiful cheek. The moments matter. Each act of kindness, each act of love, of discipleship, makes the most of the life God gives. He wants life lived in the moments. Not the hours, or the days, or the weeks, or the years, or the seasons. Live love now. 


Nothing happens by accident. Not for the Christian. Every incident begs us to learn. Yet, we feel like throwing our hands up at God, complaining "What's next, God?"


Instead, He wants the opposite. Be my disciple. Matthew 10:39 He that findeth his life shall lose it: and he that loseth his life for my sake shall find it. Learn to bow low and serve. Give thanks and praise in all things.


And in each hard day? There are always blessings. Always. I'm thankful for Miss Beth sitting on my knee as I kneel to wipe the floor. She hugs tight and tells me, "You're my best friend, Mommy."


I'm thankful for my husband, who passes me in the hall as we both serve. "Let me stop to hug you at least," he whispers. And we squeeze strength into one another, gather it from one another.


I'm thankful for 8-year-old Paul, who has a servant's heart. He makes toast. He's the first to pick up around here, and not because he cares about neatness. He has an acts-of-service love language. I learn this in the hard days here, and I make a mental note to serve him more. To fill his tank this way.


I'm thankful for what's happening between Mary and God. The other day Miss Mary vomited after a 12-hour reprieve. To my bent head and more of my desperate prayers, she responds quiet: "It's like God isn't even listening." At the time this crushed me, but I know God has a plan for Mary's faith. 


Sometimes, life is very hard and we endure and we believe and we love and we do the next thing. Steady. Faithful. Thankful. If you love God, He will teach you this. She is young yet, but He thinks she's ready for the hard lessons of faith. That's what 6 days of nausea, followed by slowly gaining strength, followed by living with sheer joy for the wonder of it all, teaches. 


Psalm 23:4
Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.


Ecclesiastes 3:1-8

A Time for Everything

1There is a time for everything,

and a season for every activity under heaven:

2a time to be born and a time to die,

a time to plant and a time to uproot,

3a time to kill and a time to heal,

a time to tear down and a time to build,

4a time to weep and a time to laugh,

a time to mourn and a time to dance,

5a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,

a time to embrace and a time to refrain,

6a time to search and a time to give up,

a time to keep and a time to throw away,

7a time to tear and a time to mend,

a time to be silent and a time to speak,

8a time to love and a time to hate,

a time for war and a time for peace.

Scripture source

Still Battling

Please pray for Mary and for the mommy and daddy here? She went a day and a half without vomiting, then vomited again tonight. We're worried about her and so very frustrated. We gave her only bland foods, and in small amounts, 24 hours after the last vomiting. We followed all the advice.

The ER doctor, whom I called for further advice, warned that it could last 5 to 7 days. I told her Mary now has a fear of vomiting, and she said to avoid pushing her to eat. Just push fluids, I'm told. When she feels well enough to truly eat, she'll ask for food, regardless of her fears.

How thin will she be, then, after 5 to 7 days? I'm worried for her, and for her tiny little sister, who can't afford to lose an ounce. No one else has it yet, but Beth got a hold of a cup today that Mary had used. God, please intervene here?

Please pray that Mary drinks the fluids offered her, and that God takes away her fear of vomiting? And that little sister won't get it? Thank you, friends.


Correction from the other day: Stomach viruses spread feces-hand-to-mouth and also through saliva. I neglected to mention the saliva, but I'm sure you already knew that info.. Someone asked about apple juice. Here is an article that discusses juices:
http://www.askdrsears.com/topics/childhood-illnesses/vomiting

Vomiting in Older Children: Care Guide

Mary is resting comfortably today, but last night at 8:30 PM she needed an IV for dehydration and low blood sugar. There's a right and wrong way to care for children suffering from stomach viruses. Since I found so much conflicting information out there, I want to put out some good information to help exhausted moms.

Thankfully, no one else is sick (yet).

After Vomiting

~ Wait 2 hours after vomiting, then give 1 tsp. of Gatorade (for older children), every 20 minutes. I tried a pediatric rehydrating solution (generic pedialyte), but since she didn't like it, it didn't work well. Older children prefer Gatorade, but it is second choice as it has too few electrolytes and a little too much sugar, especially for babies and toddlers. ER nurses say it's better to give Gatorade and give up on Pedialyte if you have to, to avoid a 5-hour ER visit for rehydration. The calories in the Gatorade do help if a child is sick for several days and must go without eating.

~If you don't have Gatorade, here is a recipe. Water by itself won't work well; they need sugary liquid, but not too sugary. Don't try homemade sports drinks containing orange juice.

~ Nothing acidic; and of course, no dairy.

~ Avoid apple juices and cherry juices.

If vomiting doesn't return after giving the teaspoons of Gatorade:


~ Slowly rehydrate by giving 1 - 2 ounce of Gatorade every 1 to 2 hours while awake (drinking slowly).

~ If vomiting returns, wait another 2 hours before trying 1 teaspoon of Gatorade, every 20 minutes.

Wait 24 hours after last vomiting to introduce solid foods - The most common mistake is to add solid foods too soon.

Rules for adding solid foods:
~ No dairy for 3 days
~ No fatty foods for 4-5 days
~ Nothing too sugary
~ Small amounts to start
~ Bland foods first, like saltine crackers, Cheerios, plain toast (Goldfish, Ritz, and other flavored crackers are too fatty and rich)

Signs of Dehydration
~ rapid heart rate
~ decreased urine output (no urination for 6 to 8 hours)
~ difficulty waking
~ dry tongue and dryness inside the mouth
~ no tears
~ can't keep eyes open or seems too lethargic
~ not wanting to talk

What To Expect At The Hospital

~ They will check for signs of dehydration and listen to your history of the illness.

~ Next, they'll take a small blood sample, while at the same time starting IV fluids, with an anti-nausea medication included.

~ If the blood test comes back with a low blood sugar reading, they'll add extra sugar through the IV.

~ After administering all the fluids, they'll give an ounce of Gatorade and wait to see if your child tolerates it. If no vomiting, they'll try another ounce of Gatorade and wait. If no vomiting and your child seems more alert, you will be discharged, possibly with a script for anti-nausea meds to get you through one day.

There's a 12-hour stomach virus, and a 72-hour stomach virus. Dehydration is more likely when vomiting lasts longer than 24 hours.

I've slept very little in 3 days, so my next piece of advice? Call in reinforcements, if you have them!

Avoiding Stomach Viruses

Transmission is always feces-hand-to-mouth, or through saliva, with stomach viruses.

~ Avoid sharing towels.

~ Try showers only until everyone is well.

~ Disinfect bathmat often, and especially after illness begins.

~ Never stop training them to wash hands after using the bathroom and before eating.

~ Wash hands when coming in the house from an outing, before preparing food, and after touching laundry or changing diapers.

~ Use hand sanitizer (alcohol-based) in the car after picking them up from school or events. Anti-bacterial hand gel/soap doesn't kill viruses.

Gratitude On Tuesday

Poor Miss Mary has thrown up now for thirty hours. She can't even keep the rehydration fluids down. In her desperate thirst, she keeps sneaking water. Too much too fast, I suspect. She can keep down teaspoons at a time, but when she goes to the potty and sneaks a whole cup of water, all my rehydration efforts go down the drain, literally. I have to watch her like a hawk. 


The blessing here is that I get to hold her for hours a day and read the 23rd Psalm to her. I am learning it rapidly and I recited it in the night several times last night. It's still having an immediate calming effect on me. Praise God! He is faithful!


Mary has no official signs of dehydration and hopefully the turning point will come soon. 


Meanwhile, Momma is making everyone walk around with throw-up bowls, just in case.


Mary:  "I wish I was God, Mommy. I would make this go away."


Last week when Beth gave me trouble about taking some medicine, Mary prayed from the playroom, unbeknownst to me. When she heard the fussing stop, she looked up, asking, "Did she take it, Mommy? I prayed."


I am so blessed with these signs of her developing faith, and of her knowledge of God's power! She doesn't understand a lot of theology, but she knows the most important things for her life: God is faithful. God is powerful.


You're having a lovely day, I hope? How can I pray for you this week?


photo credit

The Christian And Stress

Be still and know that I am God.

Hello there, friend. Can I ask about your stress level? How are you doing, really? Are there signs of unraveling?

As Christians it's hard for us to reconcile high stress levels with our professed faith in God. If I have faith, why am I having serious problems with stress? Why isn't my faith helping? Surely there's something God can do for me?


I've already revealed that many in my family have stress disorders. As early as college I had my first incidence of vertigo, in which the room spins rapidly and shortly after that, the lovely vomit. I'm not sure I had ever heard of vertigo at that time, but a doctor visit revealed that my spinning room and nausea were harmless. Just one of the many ways our bodies respond to stress.


Vertigo resurfaced recently. As well, three times in the last two years I've had psychosomatic illnesses. Once my ear hurt acutely for two days. Convinced if I didn't get treatment I'd have trouble caring for my kids, I went to urgent care. We don't have adequate support here and caring for my kids while sick is an ongoing fear, based on past difficult experiences (namely, a bad flu experienced in fall, 2009). 


Your eardrum looks perfect. It's your Eustachian tubes causing the pain, probably, the doctor said. Inflammation from allergy can cause pain. As soon as I got home--knowing nothing was going on and my mothering could resume uninterrupted--all pain stopped.


There were two incidences of frequency and urge with my bladder. I went to urgent care thinking I surely had a UTI and would have trouble caring for the kids if I let it become a kidney infection. With no insurance, how would we deal with a kidney infection? The money involved in health care promises a new set of worries. 


After giving birth to Beth I did have a UTI, along with my first and only C section and serious nursing difficulties. It was a ghastly time around here; my recovery was too slow for our needs. 


People will give their money when you're in hardship, but their time? That's another story. I've learned first hand the importance of offering people your time, after first assuring them you've seen messy houses and had them yourself. Your messy house won't shock me. I come to love you, not judge you. Adding these words is so important when mothers are in great need.


Elderly people can be reluctant to help for fear of contracting illnesses themselves. And younger people are often overwhelmed with their own families; it's not hard to see why help is not always available. Still, I have felt the need and I pray that I will extend my love and services to those in need, without regard to myself. God, may it be so!


Anyhow, both times in the last two years, my urine was crystal clear. I was given a prescription anyway, based on my symptoms. The first time I took the medicine, but this last time I figured something out:  I'm a stressed out dork, imagining illnesses. 


The doctor, though admitting that last time they were unable to grow anything in a culture, insisted I leave with a prescription. I threw it away because by the time I'd driven home, I knew what was up. My stress and anxiety are out of control.  All frequency and urge stopped as soon as I got home.


I could see what was coming. If I don't do something to stop this stress process, I'll end up with panic attacks like my mom, brother, and many others in the family line. That's the next step up from psychosomatic illnesses (just my hunch).


My silly mistake will cost about $200, due to no insurance. It was too late to keep the sample from going to the lab and the doctor visit itself was $130.


Last night at 1:00 AM Mary threw up. Our hunch? She ate all her dinner food at Daddy's insistence, so she could get a donut for dessert. But she was simply too full. 


I cleaned her up, changed her bed, showered her with kisses, and tucked her in again with a throw-up bowl. Then, after rinsing out the yucky stuff and putting the sheets in the washer and disinfecting everything, I went to bed myself. 


My thoughts were thus: If she throws up again in the next couple hours, it's probably a gastrointestinal virus. If not, she was just too full.


I thought about the prednisone Beth had for a week, knowing that it weakened her immune system. What if Beth gets a virus? Will she end up in the hospital? What if we all get it? Will I be able to adequately care for the children with husband gone 12 hours a day? How will we manage? What if husband gets sick and we lose income (only one of his part-time jobs offers sick time).


I could feel my stress level rising. God, help me calm down so the room won't start spinning. I hate throwing up, God. Help me change my reaction to stress. It's the only answer, God. I don't want anti-anxiety medication, nor can I afford it. I'm a Christian God. Surely you can help me?


Then I took a deep breath. Closed my eyes. 


What came to my mind next? Psalm 23. 


I recited as much as I could remember. And the calming effect? Immediate.


Memorize it, He said. Recite it every single time something goes wrong. Be still and know that I am God, by the comfort of this Psalm.


My friend, I don't know your family history or your circumstances, but I urge you: Don't ignore your stress. Take the Lord's advice. Memorize this Psalm by yourself or as a family...two or three verses a week. I believe God can help, despite family history. If you truly need medication, take it. God gives man the ability to develop medicines to make life more comfortable, less tragic. 


But first, try this.


Psalm 23 (KJV)

1 The LORD is my shepherd; I shall not want. 

2  He maketh me to lie down in green pastures: he leadeth me beside the still waters.

3 He restoreth my soul: he leadeth me in the paths of righteousness for his name's sake.
4 Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil: for thou art with me; thy rod and thy staff they comfort me.

5 Thou preparest a table before me in the presence of mine enemies: thou anointest my head with oil; my cup runneth over.
6 Surely goodness and mercy shall follow me all the days of my life: and I will dwell in the house of the LORD for ever.

Scripture source

Photo source