about those blog click stats

Just wanted to add something about blog statistics. I mentioned that only two people clicked on Kristin's Kenya story. I should add, for your comfort, that I don't know who clicks on what (and I wouldn't want to)--nor does any other blog author, unless they have some sophisticated equipment needed for crime solving, or whatever. I know little to nothing about technology.

Google blog stats show number of clicks, I assume, so blog authors will know what interests readers. Most stats seem to be designed for business blogs, or those containing advertisements or products. As such most of them are of little use to me. Interesting sometimes, but not very useful. And I write a knee-jerk, emotional kind of blog, so what people want to read doesn't usually figure in.

 I rarely have time to click on links, myself. When I sit down to read something during the day (or stand, as is often the case), I've usually got five minutes to spare. After the kids go to bed, I know that clicking on links means I probably won't get my dishes done, or my last laundry load shuffled. Dangerous.

So I know, first hand, why few moms click on links.


Another Random Topic

If I ever write a book before I die, I'm in trouble.  Publishers require you to push your own book nowadays, using blogs, Facebook and Twitter.  I'm so not a business woman.  I would abhor having to do this. Writing for magazines seems so much more appealing.

It'd be interesting to know whether self-promotion really works.  Ann Voskamp works very hard to push her book, while The Pioneer Woman, who has three books out, says very little on her blog about them, especially after publication release.  And yet both women are on the New York Times Bestseller lists for their genres.

Both women give generously to charity, so any self-promotion they do benefits the less fortunate. I find no fault in it.

Nevertheless, I hope publishers do away with the self-promotion requirement.  Not every author is also a savvy business person. Why not just ask them to picture the book on their blog, and provide a link for buying?

On a whim one day, I looked into submitting guest posts to (in)courage (a wonderful site, by the way). I found that you have to list your Twitter account, probably so they can see how many followers you have.

Is that what our society's been reduced to?  How many followers we have?

Insert eye roll here.

6 Ways to Love Your Husband Better

My heart broke a little this morning.

Two-year-old Beth got into something my husband left out, wasting it (and money). He was extremely frustrated. His ADHD makes it very difficult to attend to his personal items. Simple organizational tasks the rest of us take for granted, are huge for inattentive-type ADHD sufferers (Peter, my son, doesn't have this type).

I kept quiet, letting his frustration vent. I heard him say:  "She can't grow up soon enough for me! And I won't be adopting any little ones from a third world country, either."

Heartbroken, I just dropped my head, attending to Beth's diaper.

Mind you, my husband isn't a jerk, though this comment makes him seem like one. Yes, it was one of his worst moments, but we all have such moments. He exerts himself plenty to love us all sacrificially.

And even if my husband's heart was open to adoption, we would never qualify, due to poverty-level income and our ages. Besides, I hadn't even asked him about adoption. Perhaps the Lord's been at work in some way?  I don't know.

Husband has suffered incredible stress in the past two years, so very little of what he does or says right now, is his true self. That's never far from my mind.

Still, the hardness of his comments broke me.

He left for work after this, and I started a conversation with my heavenly Father. I have a list to share, which the Holy Spirit helped me compile.

6 Ways to Love Your Husband Better


~ When he disappoints you, go to your Father. Most things don't require a response. Pray something like: "Our Father, help me to magnify the good things about my husband, and apply grace to the bad things. Prevent me from stewing, from responding in anger, from holding a grudge. Remind me of my own need of grace."

~ Your husband wants respect more than love.  He's just wired that way.  Never complain about the living he provides--your everyday living circumstances--even if it's just to say you have nothing to wear. His burden to provide is huge. Be grateful and sensitive, thanking him for his hard work.

~ Serve him as much as you can, in love.  This is hard when little children keep you running, but simple things like bringing him a cold drink without being asked, blesses him. Any sign of respect blesses him!

~ Go to him with your personal difficulties, when other matters aren't stressing him. Let him lead you. This is so hard for women! We often think we can do it better. Practice getting out of the way, and see how his leadership skills develop. You'll feel blessed. He'll feel respected.

~ Leave him alone as he plays and interacts with the children. Let him be himself. If we want our men to be good fathers, we have to stop interfering. Pray much, say little.

~ Be willing to live out the Gospel in your home, because you are no better.

Remember, marriage doesn't complete us. God does. Once we realize this, we can love our spouses sacrificially. Marriage, like parenthood, is just another avenue by which we're sanctified.

Guest Post: Amy's Prayer Warrior Journey, Vol.5

Friends, I asked Amy to share five posts with us, so today is the last installment of Amy's Prayer Warrior Journey. Please show your appreciation in the comments section! Thank you.

And would you prayerfully consider sharing with us yourself?  It doesn't have to be weekly. You can share whenever the Holy Spirit puts something on your mind. He will guide you. Consider that sharing with us will give you some accountability as you get started on a daily prayer journey.  If you are interested, please e-mail me at christine4431(at)ymail(dot)com  

Amy's Prayer Warrior Journey, Vol. 5

Christine's call to begin praying every day has been such a blessing to me. The Holy Spirit spoke through her writing to call me back to a structured prayer time. As I've mentioned before, for whatever reasons, I had let my prayer/devotion time slip away. I remember telling my husband I didn't even know what to say when I did pray. 

At the time, I was exhausted, overwhelmed, and full of complaints. I felt as if I was drowning in my life. I knew I needed to spend time with God, but just didn't know how to begin. Christine reminded me of the ACTS (Adoration, Confession, Thanksgiving, Supplication) acronym to use as a guideline. That was so helpful as I committed to begin praying each night at Christine's encouragement. 

 

At the beginning, I adhered strictly to the ACTS outline.  It helped me stay focused and prevented me from just going before the Lord with my needs/concerns.  That time of adoration was so beneficial and I realized I had been leaving that out.  

During the first few weeks, God taught me so much just through my prayer time.  I was able to remember his goodness, faithfulness, awesomeness, and truly see all the blessings in my life.  As the weeks went on it was so good to spend time quiet before the Lord, praising Him, sharing with Him, and having anxiety relieved.  

Now, as I pray, I don't have to be so strict in the way I pray.  As Christine has noted in her posts, the Holy Spirit begins to reveal things to me that I need to pray for.  Because I am praying consistently, I am able to pray for more people and repent of sins quicker than before.  

I would encourage everyone to set aside time, even a short amount of time, to pray daily.  It is such a blessing! 

Here are links for Vol. 1, and Vol. 2, and Vol. 3, and Vol. 4

12 Reasons to Love Your Daughters

I love to write. It's soothing. It's cathartic. It's a window to the heart. After words flow free, and the last line is punctuated, I feel lighter.

But it's also complicated and messy, requiring hours, months, years, before true beauty emerges. Some say it's a craft, some say an art.

Blogging archives make it easy to look back at old work......and cringe.  Yes, all writers, professional or amateur, cringe at their old work. The 10,000 hour principal is at work here. The more you practice, the better you write.  So old stuff stinks, and new stuff rocks. And finally, after ten thousand hours, you're an expert. (Or so it's said.)

Last night I wrote something that made me cringe the next morning. Yet I didn't want to delete it. It contained something my heart felt, and something my mind knew. I wanted to share it. When the kids went with Daddy to the park, I spent some time trying to fix it. It was too long, too unclear, didn't use examples or anecdotes, contained too many ideas, and the title didn't fit.  I can spot good writing, but I can't always produce it in the time available to me.

After revisions, which I posted, I still hated it.

So, to ward off further frustration, I will post lists for a few days. It's hard to mess up lists. Every writer knows that and uses lists when other words and ideas won't flow.

Top 12 Reasons I Love My Girls

~ They cuddle with me a lot.

~ Their pretty hair smells divine.

~ The look in the mirror at their behinds, mimicking Mommy.

~ They have beautiful smiles.

~ They love to bake with me.

~ They love to boss their brothers, repeating whatever Mommy says.  "You're fooling around in there! Be done with your shower in three minutes!" (Okay, right now it's just the two year old doing this, in her less-than-perfect enunciation of the English language.)

~ They are so sensitive, you have to speak sweetly to get the best results.

~ They always want to do it themselves. The boys are happy to be served.

~ Some day, Lord willing, I'll be able to hold their babies for hours, while they catch up on the house. Sometimes I think I was born to hold babies.

~ They are as gentle as they are stubborn.

~ When they put on a dress, they feel special.

~ They love their Daddy.  So do I.

(Updated)The Prayer Warrior Life: Be Vigilant

When you start a spiritual practice and get through that initial fight with Satan, it's all good. Even amazing. Whether it's newly disciplined Bible reading, or disciplined prayer, or disciplined giving, or regular hospitality....whatever, you feel triumphant. You've established a habit.

Let's face it, forming a habit that doesn't include chocolate or other obvious delight, like a lazy Sunday nap or a sunset beach walk, is hard. It can be so hard it hurts.

Are you praying daily? Congratulations!

Realize something now, though. You can never relax in your spiritual habit.

Oh, I know what you'll say. But the habit feels entrenched. This will last forever.

No. You're still on a slippery slope. Never let your guard down.

You can't say:

Well.....the thirty minutes of prayer will still happen tonight--it's part of who I am now--but right now, I really need to......

Before you know it, something else interferes (especially if you're a mom).  Satan still whispers that you need this or that instead--maybe not as loud as when you first began your habit quest, but rest assured, he's still there, making ugly.

Why must you be so vigilant? It has to do with that beautiful, tragic gift called free will.

I've written before that I'm a Calvinist, basically believing that God chooses us. We don't have the capacity to choose him, as spiritually dead beings.(Feel free to disagree, as always.)

But what about after salvation is secure? Once we're chosen--saved and written in the Book of Life--do we have the capacity to choose God over ourselves?

Let's explore that.

Our salvation awakens our spirit and allows us to hear God.  The Holy Spirit comes to dwell in us and he whispers guidance.  He nudges us in the right direction.  Our part? Yes, I'll go there.  I'll do that.  I'll say that.  We still must apply ourselves....we still must exert our free will and say....Yes, I'll obey.

Obedience and free will don't act as a team. No surprise there, right? One is always vying for first place.

And yet, nothing good happens in our spiritual lives without the daily practice of dying to self. Obedience knows she must die to self. But free will? She's always looking for a party.

The Holy Spirit reigns in free will. If we let him, he'll channel free will to glorify God.

The problem is that, over time, with complacency, we grow less receptive to the Holy Spirit's nudges, making it harder for Him to affect heart change....making it harder for him to reign in free will.

Without the Holy Spirit we can do nothing. We are nothing. That's why we must keep our ears and our hearts tuned in. That's why it's so crucial that we develop, and keep vigilant about, a prayer and Bible reading habit.  

So the answer to the question: Do we have the capacity to choose God over ourselves once we're saved?

Is yes.....if we're praying and reading the Bible habitually.

Pray for your yes. Pray about your spiritual habits...that the Holy Spirit will reign in your free will. Start your day with words such as these:

Our Father, help me to die to myself today. Help me to choose you all day. Help me to read and pray today, as planned. Increase my sensitivity to your Spirit. 


Notice the as planned part of that prayer. Be intentional. Have a plan, even if it requires (at first) sticky notes in several rooms. For example, in the bathroom, pray for husband...reminded by a sticky note on the mirror. In the kitchen, pray for the kids.....reminded by a sticky note over the sink or the stove. This may sound crazy to those with two kids. But to moms of many (or moms of littles), it isn't crazy.

Crazy is the number of times they've fluffed their husband's work shirts, due to all the interruptions.

The number of kids you have, the number of years or months between them, and the age of the youngest, will determine how innovative you must be. Caring for a baby and a two year old at the same time is probably the most challenging. I've done it twice. My prayers are with you on that.

But don't wait on this. Sit down with your husband and brainstorm ways you can make prayer and Bible reading habitual. I could give you more specifics, but each family situation is too unique. I think your husband would be better at helping you come up with strategies. Plus, you'll need his help with the kids, probably, to make your spiritual practices habitual. Bring him into the equation now, because after all, he's your spiritual leader, not some mommy-blogger wannabe.

Your ability to choose Him daily...to hear Him...to obey Him, depends on it.