Overheard:
Peter, cleaning the playroom and handing me a couple choking hazards: "That's another reason to clean, isn't it? So we can find all the choking hazards. We're doing a good job of keeping Beth alive, aren't we?"
The other thing I have to share is my frustration with potty teaching. My Mary turned three last December. She has been going in the potty since 18 months old, with our encouragement (never pressure). However, she has no internal incentive to train. We do all the work. Sometimes I get tired of that, and just give up and change diapers.
Recently, I put her in underpants and told her that they wouldn't hold any pee, and that she needed to get to the potty, with our help, before she had to go. She wet soon after that (I kept her off the furniture). Then fifteen minutes later, she wet again. The next day, the same thing kept occurring. There is no sign of urinary tract infection. I gave up this method, and have gone back to diapers.
What's up with the frequent wetting??? One of the listed requirements is for children to stay dry for a couple hours, indicating readiness for training. Why does that happen so late in my kids? I had the same problem with the boys. They went very frequently, as if they couldn't fully empty their bladders. Or they just didn't want to sit long enough to fully empty their bladders.
Both boys trained at age 3 years, 8 months--never looking back. Is it just an inherited thing, this late potty training? I do have extended family who wet the bed until age nine, and I have a late bed wetter who still wears nighttime pull ups. Late night wetting CAN be related to ADHD, according to some. Late is considered to be past age 6. This same child also wets during naps, indicating to me that it's involuntary--a deep sleeping thing. He only takes naps when he's ill.
60% of kids are trained by age 3, and about 95% are trained by age 4. Do any of you have three year olds who still wet frequently--not able to stay dry for two hours, or going twice a hour?
Thanks for your input!
4 comments:
It's been so long for me that I can barely remember. I do recall something different that I did with my boys that maybe made a difference (who really know?). they always had a cup of water by their bed at night. I know this sounds counter-intuitive, but my guys were dry over night before they mastered it in the day time. I think there was something about having a full(er) bladder that made them hold it better.
But I really have no idea. We did the carpet cleaner method. (John Rosemond says something about letting them run around naked and pee all over and then hire a carpet cleaner when it's done.) But mine are boys so their biggest motivation was to hold it so they could run outside and pee off the deck. See what a terrible mom I am?It worked.
Anyway...it makes me smile remembering when my boys were little enough to potty train. Thanks for helping me remember (because--as per your last post) I get those baby blues sometimes too.
Smiling, though :)
When I tried last year with Beeper at 3 1/2 he had frequent accidents (he never stayed dry for more than half a day). After a couple of weeks of that I was frustrated and wondering what to do differently, but since the baby was due soon, we decided to give up and try again later. I've felt recently like the time was right, so we tried again. In the last two weeks, he has had a total of three accidents. He's never had an accident while we were out, and after the first week, he started taking it upon himself to go in the morning, even though he was still wearing a diaper.
Was it frustrating and embarrasing to have a kid who didn't potty train until 4? Yes. Was it worth it to wait until he was ready? I think so. It has been so much less work this time. Even though he was resistant and told me several times he didn't want to do it, he still did it, and I have rarely had to ask him whether he needed to go.
Actually, all but one of the accidents were just because he didn't make it to the bathroom in time. Rather than not being able to hold it, he has the opposite problem. He's really good at holding it for as long as he can, then he suddenly has to go RIGHT NOW.
Oh, and he is related to several late trainers, bed wetters and accident prone on either side, so it may be genetic.
Hi Pam... Relax and let her train when she's ready. I think you're doing a great job of offering the potty to her, but not forcing it. You might try "offering" the panties too and let her decide when she's ready. My daughter was physically ready before age three (dry at night, and dry for long periods during the day, and she had an awareness of when she had to go), but after a couple of weeks of perfect compliance in panties, she decided she didn't want to go on the potty any more and regressed. For MONTHS I dug my heels in and tried to force it. It was an extremely unpleasant and stressful spring and summer. My pediatrician told me to put her back in diapers and let her decide, but I didn't listen. I didn't want her to win. I knew she could do it. I felt a principle was on the line. After a very rough 5+ months she was finally reliable. My big regret is that I didn't let go of this and let her decide when she was ready. There are so many, many things I could have done differently and/or better.
My best advice is to pray for guidance as to what God would have you do for this particular child. It may be similar to the older ones and it may be totally different. I regret not truly seeking God's plan for how I would help my child through this milestone. That's not to say I didn't pray about it, but I'm quite certain I counseled God on exactly what she and I needed, instead of seeking His wisdom. Afterall, she's His creation. I try not carry guilt on this, accept His forgiveness, learn from it and move on.
These are just my two cents on the topic, I don't pretend to have it all figured out.
p.s. I "potty trained" our puppy without a hitch! :-)
Yikes! Sorry... can you edit my comment and fix my error? Sorry again.
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