When my babies died in my womb, when my husband lost his job, I walked around in a mourning-daze, unable to concentrate or sleep. I cracked eggs and absentmindedly put them down the sink instead of in bowls. I drove past my exit on the freeway and went to the store for a certain thing, only to come home without it. When I didn't have a duty to perform, I sat and stared at walls.
I couldn't smile or read and I prayed in words or groans, not sentences.
Last Thursday something emotionally devastating happened to someone whom I know very well. I'm in that mourning daze once again, though this time the tragedy isn't mine.
I asked myself 48 hours in, am I over identifying with this? Is that the problem? Am I failing to trust that God will redeem it and raise up the oppressed? Do I lack faith?
Certain scriptures came to me then, on the third day. Next, a modicum of peace arrived, not taking away the despair, but lessening it. This peace came quite suddenly, as though someone had prayed and God heard and he washed His spirit over me.
What does it mean to mourn with those who mourn? Simply to feel sad that the world is so broken, and to increase your pray for someone? To make a meal for someone or send a card? Maybe it depends on whether you're in their inner circle or not, but one thing I've learned is this:
We're not meant to push away these all-consuming feelings or simply "snap out of it". We need to walk through it, in solidarity with them.
Hebrews 13:3
Remember those in prison as if you were their fellow prisoners, and those who are mistreated as if you yourselves were suffering.
Have I not wept for those in trouble? Has not my soul grieved for the poor?
Ecclesiastes 3:4
a time to weep and a time to laugh, a time to mourn and a time to dance
When Job's three friends, Eliphaz the Temanite, Bildad the Shuhite and Zophar the Naamathite, heard about all the troubles that had come upon him, they set out from their homes and met together by agreement to go and sympathize with him and comfort him.
One of my prayer partners and I are praying one specific prayer right now, and I invite you to join us.
Financial devastation due to the slow economy, and now this emotional devastation, both loom large right now and things could easily get too dark for this person. There appears to be no hope, on any front. She already lives too solitary a life, with too much time alone. Please pray: That God will give Person A tangible evidence that he exists and he loves her.
Thank you, friends!
2 comments:
I love your heart for your hurting friend.
I was thinking along the following lines a few days ago... i.e. "to what extent can and should we help a hurting Christian?"
I remember sharing something upsetting with a Christian sister and being told: "Everyone has problems and you just have to get on with it!" This seems to be the general spiritual climate on the east coast of Scotland. It's an awful Christian attitude, i.e. lacking in compassion and love.
Being in the midst of a difficult and emotionally painful situation, I would HATE that I could not encourage or help another Christian in whatever way I could if they were going through a difficult time.
Oh, yes, Wendy. I've heard the same response. So hurtful, isn't it, to trust someone and have them tell you to "move on"? You are a sweet sister in Christ and I am so grateful for your heart. Love to you!
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